adieno
01-25-2013, 10:53 AM
I am new here just found it browsing around one of those sleepless nights when my fears wanted to take over, by reading all your posts I felt so much better and normal. Didn't feel alone. So thanks .
I've actually have been dealing with panic and anxiety for about 15 yrs but only confirmed 2 years ago. Yes I've been through tons of doctors and testings that I can't even count. From continuous blood work, halter monitors, echocardiograms, brain mri , being diagnosed w mitral valve prolapse etc. everything started way back when I drank an appetite stimulator to help me gain weight which I still want to gain. This contained a hormone substance that I was allergic to and I ended having a horrible reaction to it and I ended up at an ER. I couldn't breathe my throat just locked, my eyes got stiff and heavy as did my tongue, I couldn't feel my face or tongue. Couldn't talk. It was horrible. Thankfully it just took a couple shots to reverse the effects but I was scared for life. I kept reliving the moment after that day and ended up at the ER every other week and eventually they referred me to a cardiologist for palpitations and after diagnosed w mitral valve prolapse MVP. For years I read and read information about this and it all made sense I thought everything was Bcuz of this and my life changed drastically. I couldn't bare to be at school, go to supermarkets, family events, or just go out w my friends. I tried to always have them go to my place. As I got older I forced myself to get a job when I finished hs. It was hard to start college as my concentration got worse and worse eventually I took a break and haven't been able to be back. I took a full time job to feel useful and ended up getting so much into it that 7 yrs after here I am, I moved up a lot at the company I was working everything on that end was great but being there was turning into a nightmare hiding the symptoms and the stress didn't help at all. I had a boss that took advantage of my capabilities of doing her job and when I wanted to say something it was too late I was doing her job already and i had to resign. Really hard decision to take as my job was everything and my coverup for feeling so bad about my health and not being able to do more. To rap up during those 7 yrs of going to a cardiologist for the MVP and drinking beta blockers and getting no where my doc told me to see a psychiatrist. Nothing against them but unfortunately I went the the wrong person who only wanted me to drink a pill and disregard the real issue with me. Out of desperation of wanting my life back I drank the meds and got worse. This doesn't mean they are bad the problem is that I needed help to overcome my trauma of drinking medication before and that's how this doctor failed. I had the worst reaction my husband ended up calling 911 I couldn't even see him and was like in a twilight zone. After this episode everything got so much worse. And yea the doctor I was seeing wanted me to keep taking the pill despite what had happened and how I told him how I couldn't drink it. Anyway within a few I looked for new alternatives and found out about cbt and so far it's doing good. My hopes are all in this new experience. The trick is to find the right person who listens along w the right treatment. Not giving up keep fighting the fight and see what I keep learning through this all. Happy to have more ppl to talk with.
Much love :)
<3
I've actually have been dealing with panic and anxiety for about 15 yrs but only confirmed 2 years ago. Yes I've been through tons of doctors and testings that I can't even count. From continuous blood work, halter monitors, echocardiograms, brain mri , being diagnosed w mitral valve prolapse etc. everything started way back when I drank an appetite stimulator to help me gain weight which I still want to gain. This contained a hormone substance that I was allergic to and I ended having a horrible reaction to it and I ended up at an ER. I couldn't breathe my throat just locked, my eyes got stiff and heavy as did my tongue, I couldn't feel my face or tongue. Couldn't talk. It was horrible. Thankfully it just took a couple shots to reverse the effects but I was scared for life. I kept reliving the moment after that day and ended up at the ER every other week and eventually they referred me to a cardiologist for palpitations and after diagnosed w mitral valve prolapse MVP. For years I read and read information about this and it all made sense I thought everything was Bcuz of this and my life changed drastically. I couldn't bare to be at school, go to supermarkets, family events, or just go out w my friends. I tried to always have them go to my place. As I got older I forced myself to get a job when I finished hs. It was hard to start college as my concentration got worse and worse eventually I took a break and haven't been able to be back. I took a full time job to feel useful and ended up getting so much into it that 7 yrs after here I am, I moved up a lot at the company I was working everything on that end was great but being there was turning into a nightmare hiding the symptoms and the stress didn't help at all. I had a boss that took advantage of my capabilities of doing her job and when I wanted to say something it was too late I was doing her job already and i had to resign. Really hard decision to take as my job was everything and my coverup for feeling so bad about my health and not being able to do more. To rap up during those 7 yrs of going to a cardiologist for the MVP and drinking beta blockers and getting no where my doc told me to see a psychiatrist. Nothing against them but unfortunately I went the the wrong person who only wanted me to drink a pill and disregard the real issue with me. Out of desperation of wanting my life back I drank the meds and got worse. This doesn't mean they are bad the problem is that I needed help to overcome my trauma of drinking medication before and that's how this doctor failed. I had the worst reaction my husband ended up calling 911 I couldn't even see him and was like in a twilight zone. After this episode everything got so much worse. And yea the doctor I was seeing wanted me to keep taking the pill despite what had happened and how I told him how I couldn't drink it. Anyway within a few I looked for new alternatives and found out about cbt and so far it's doing good. My hopes are all in this new experience. The trick is to find the right person who listens along w the right treatment. Not giving up keep fighting the fight and see what I keep learning through this all. Happy to have more ppl to talk with.
Much love :)
<3