CEC
01-20-2013, 01:06 PM
Hello,
I'll start off with a little about myself. I'm 19 years old, and throughout most of my life I was always quite a shy child. Over the past few years I began to develop some wierd feelings and thoughts in which my doctor determined were anxiety symptoms. Around the time these symptoms had began developing I had recently lost a friend in a car accident, and felt as if I was losing my sanity. I was extremely depressed and couldn't do a thing without feeling as if I was going to pass out, thinking that things around me just didnt feel as real as they should or that life seemed kind of cloudy, my mind seemed blank at times, and I had a huge fear that I would develop a mental disorder such as schizophrenia or dementia. Over the past year however these symptoms had dwindled down to a minimum until recently. Lately I've been feeling the same way, along with feeling as if I'm always in thought, thinking of my anxiety, what it may turn into in the future, wondering if I will ever lose my mind, I have trouble being calm at work, I'm always tense, always lightheaded, always have scary thoughts which are completely irrational running through my head, and I even cannot go for long drives the way I use to, or even listen to some of the music I was into in high school because it just makes me anxious. I'm terrified. Being in public places with alot of people drives me crazy at the moment. If my parents or a friend try joking around with me or telling me this whole anxiety thing is "all in my head" I usually lash out immediately and tell them to shut up and leave me alone, which I feel awful about. I recently gave up on an old bad habit, throughout my last two years of high school I would smoke marijuana on occassion to try and relax and have a good time with friends, this wasnt an every day thing, maybe once a month or so, but after probably one of the worst anxiety attacks I've ever had after smoking a couple months ago I decided it was best to never go back to that habit. I also had a quite rough break up over the summer which I feel had alot to do with bringing this all back. I have gone to therapy on and off for the past two years or so, it helped a great amount when I first started with this, but as of recent the most it does is get rid of my symptoms for a few hours following my appointment and then the symptoms soon return. I want nothing more but to get rid of these feelings and be able to go out with my friends and family, enjoy life, and have confidence that everything will turn out okay.
If anyone can spare some advice on what I can do to begin conquering my anxiety and depression it would be much appreciated. God bless.
I'll start off with a little about myself. I'm 19 years old, and throughout most of my life I was always quite a shy child. Over the past few years I began to develop some wierd feelings and thoughts in which my doctor determined were anxiety symptoms. Around the time these symptoms had began developing I had recently lost a friend in a car accident, and felt as if I was losing my sanity. I was extremely depressed and couldn't do a thing without feeling as if I was going to pass out, thinking that things around me just didnt feel as real as they should or that life seemed kind of cloudy, my mind seemed blank at times, and I had a huge fear that I would develop a mental disorder such as schizophrenia or dementia. Over the past year however these symptoms had dwindled down to a minimum until recently. Lately I've been feeling the same way, along with feeling as if I'm always in thought, thinking of my anxiety, what it may turn into in the future, wondering if I will ever lose my mind, I have trouble being calm at work, I'm always tense, always lightheaded, always have scary thoughts which are completely irrational running through my head, and I even cannot go for long drives the way I use to, or even listen to some of the music I was into in high school because it just makes me anxious. I'm terrified. Being in public places with alot of people drives me crazy at the moment. If my parents or a friend try joking around with me or telling me this whole anxiety thing is "all in my head" I usually lash out immediately and tell them to shut up and leave me alone, which I feel awful about. I recently gave up on an old bad habit, throughout my last two years of high school I would smoke marijuana on occassion to try and relax and have a good time with friends, this wasnt an every day thing, maybe once a month or so, but after probably one of the worst anxiety attacks I've ever had after smoking a couple months ago I decided it was best to never go back to that habit. I also had a quite rough break up over the summer which I feel had alot to do with bringing this all back. I have gone to therapy on and off for the past two years or so, it helped a great amount when I first started with this, but as of recent the most it does is get rid of my symptoms for a few hours following my appointment and then the symptoms soon return. I want nothing more but to get rid of these feelings and be able to go out with my friends and family, enjoy life, and have confidence that everything will turn out okay.
If anyone can spare some advice on what I can do to begin conquering my anxiety and depression it would be much appreciated. God bless.