scalise530
01-04-2013, 08:38 AM
Hi All,
My first post as I am new to this forum. I wanted to explain some current issues I've been dealing with, give a little of my background and see if anyone else agrees this could be caused solely by anxiety/panic:
I've been dealing with random physical ailments for the past 7 years. I'm currently 32, started noticing physical related anxiety symptoms around the age of 24-25. The first few years, it was headaches and head pains, that disipated and next it was stomach pains and belching, that disapated and I was generally symptom free for several years (minus the occasional worry about a flu that took a few days to get over, etc but nothing serious). I have seen a psychologist off and on but around 2 months ago, we ended therapy as he moved to Pakistan for family reasons. Shortly after we ended therapy, I started to develop a cough. It snuck up on me when I was laughing one day, a loud barking cough came out that kind of startled me. After that 1 cough, I immediately began worrying that I had a serious illness, and started almost forcing myself to cough to see if I could reproduce that same noise. A few weeks of that went by, and before you know it, I was having full blown coughing fits a few times a day, with random ones popping out maybe a few times an hour. Additionally, when I wasn't coughing, I would feel the need to clear my throat often and it seemed like I was having daily allergy attacks (which I previously never noticed I had). Being who I am, I immediately went to the doctor after the first few coughing fits. He prescribed me a Z pac and sent me on my way. A week later, after no change in symptoms, I went back and was given a chest x ray which showed a very small hazy area which my doctor and the radiographer said was a very small lung infection (pneumonia). This immediately sent me into full blown panic as I had been google-ing symptoms for weeks all of which led me to believe I had early lung cancer (which, for more history, my father died of when I was 14). Of course, during my google-ing, I found patient stories where they had said their lung cancer was mis-diagnosed as pneumonia in the beginning, so I did not believe the doctor or radiologist's opinion (even though my friend, a nurse, reassured me that it would be very hard to mis-diagnose someone as young as me due to the way the lung's age and other reasons). After this xray, I was given an antibiotic and set up with a follow up 1 week later. All through that week, I suffered almost daily panic attacks and extreme anxiety (of course, during Christmas which was ruined). At the follow up appointment, another chest xray was done which showed the spot had diminished in intensity by 50% or more. My doctor believed the antibiotic was working and was satisfied, but I finally put my cards on the table and told him about the intense fears I have been having related to this (my doctor, to his credit, never knew of my anxiety issues). I told him how I had been convinced immediately after the initial x ray that I had early lung cancer that needed to be caught before it could spread. After a long conversation, he told me that to ease my mind he would order a chest CT which would definitevely show if anything more sinister was going on (though I could tell at this point he thought it was unnecessary). Of course, the chest CT came back yesterday completely clear minus a few harmless glands which he said are completely normal and the radiologist only mentions them because he says they have to. No tumors, no suspicious lesions, no lymph node activity, even no more pneumonia. 100% healthy lungs and trachea. Today however, I wake up and within an hour after waking my coughing is still present. Some things I've noticed over the past few weeks are that it seems to come and go depending on how much attention I pay to it (a red flag obviously that it is being driven by my own anxiety I'm sure). For example, I frequently wake up during the middle of the night. Upon initially waking, I never feel the urge to cough. When I go to the gym and run - no urge to cough. I ask my wife if I cough during my sleep - she tells me never (she is a night owl and is usually up for a few hours watching TV after I fall asleep). I know deep down that this cough is probably 99% mental at this point...but I still simply don't understand HOW this can be. The urge to cough is real, the sound seems real (they have all been dry coughs - no mucus or phlem/blood), so it just seems so crazy to me to believe I could have invented another symptom just by focusing on it so much. Of course, I only need to look at my past to see that I have done this before, but I think I've blocked out those times so much I don't remember how REAL it felt to me then (I had an MRI of the brain at the time of the headaches and an endoscopy when I was having the stomach issues...both obviously 100% normal findings). At this point, I am just at a loss. With each cough, I find myself doubting the results of the chest CT, yet I know how absolutely ludicrous that seems based on all of the evidence at hand. It seems like I am almost completely useless at stopping these coughing fits and my thoughts are running wild as to what could be causing them. Does anyone have any advice??
My first post as I am new to this forum. I wanted to explain some current issues I've been dealing with, give a little of my background and see if anyone else agrees this could be caused solely by anxiety/panic:
I've been dealing with random physical ailments for the past 7 years. I'm currently 32, started noticing physical related anxiety symptoms around the age of 24-25. The first few years, it was headaches and head pains, that disipated and next it was stomach pains and belching, that disapated and I was generally symptom free for several years (minus the occasional worry about a flu that took a few days to get over, etc but nothing serious). I have seen a psychologist off and on but around 2 months ago, we ended therapy as he moved to Pakistan for family reasons. Shortly after we ended therapy, I started to develop a cough. It snuck up on me when I was laughing one day, a loud barking cough came out that kind of startled me. After that 1 cough, I immediately began worrying that I had a serious illness, and started almost forcing myself to cough to see if I could reproduce that same noise. A few weeks of that went by, and before you know it, I was having full blown coughing fits a few times a day, with random ones popping out maybe a few times an hour. Additionally, when I wasn't coughing, I would feel the need to clear my throat often and it seemed like I was having daily allergy attacks (which I previously never noticed I had). Being who I am, I immediately went to the doctor after the first few coughing fits. He prescribed me a Z pac and sent me on my way. A week later, after no change in symptoms, I went back and was given a chest x ray which showed a very small hazy area which my doctor and the radiographer said was a very small lung infection (pneumonia). This immediately sent me into full blown panic as I had been google-ing symptoms for weeks all of which led me to believe I had early lung cancer (which, for more history, my father died of when I was 14). Of course, during my google-ing, I found patient stories where they had said their lung cancer was mis-diagnosed as pneumonia in the beginning, so I did not believe the doctor or radiologist's opinion (even though my friend, a nurse, reassured me that it would be very hard to mis-diagnose someone as young as me due to the way the lung's age and other reasons). After this xray, I was given an antibiotic and set up with a follow up 1 week later. All through that week, I suffered almost daily panic attacks and extreme anxiety (of course, during Christmas which was ruined). At the follow up appointment, another chest xray was done which showed the spot had diminished in intensity by 50% or more. My doctor believed the antibiotic was working and was satisfied, but I finally put my cards on the table and told him about the intense fears I have been having related to this (my doctor, to his credit, never knew of my anxiety issues). I told him how I had been convinced immediately after the initial x ray that I had early lung cancer that needed to be caught before it could spread. After a long conversation, he told me that to ease my mind he would order a chest CT which would definitevely show if anything more sinister was going on (though I could tell at this point he thought it was unnecessary). Of course, the chest CT came back yesterday completely clear minus a few harmless glands which he said are completely normal and the radiologist only mentions them because he says they have to. No tumors, no suspicious lesions, no lymph node activity, even no more pneumonia. 100% healthy lungs and trachea. Today however, I wake up and within an hour after waking my coughing is still present. Some things I've noticed over the past few weeks are that it seems to come and go depending on how much attention I pay to it (a red flag obviously that it is being driven by my own anxiety I'm sure). For example, I frequently wake up during the middle of the night. Upon initially waking, I never feel the urge to cough. When I go to the gym and run - no urge to cough. I ask my wife if I cough during my sleep - she tells me never (she is a night owl and is usually up for a few hours watching TV after I fall asleep). I know deep down that this cough is probably 99% mental at this point...but I still simply don't understand HOW this can be. The urge to cough is real, the sound seems real (they have all been dry coughs - no mucus or phlem/blood), so it just seems so crazy to me to believe I could have invented another symptom just by focusing on it so much. Of course, I only need to look at my past to see that I have done this before, but I think I've blocked out those times so much I don't remember how REAL it felt to me then (I had an MRI of the brain at the time of the headaches and an endoscopy when I was having the stomach issues...both obviously 100% normal findings). At this point, I am just at a loss. With each cough, I find myself doubting the results of the chest CT, yet I know how absolutely ludicrous that seems based on all of the evidence at hand. It seems like I am almost completely useless at stopping these coughing fits and my thoughts are running wild as to what could be causing them. Does anyone have any advice??