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Jinaiya
12-20-2012, 01:18 AM
Like so many nights, I find myself back at this website, trying to soothe myself from fear in the middle of the night. Not sure why but it always helps. Just knowing there are other people going through fears as well.
Some nights I can stay in bed and work through it, while others, like tonight, become too overwhelming and I make the decision to just get out of bed before it becomes too intense.

My primary concern is my heart, the issue has various shapes and forms: chest pain, palpitations, and the worst, racing and/or pounding. The racing is the dominant issue and the one that keeps me up at night. Although my heart can go through periods of doing this during the day, for some reason, it seems more managable and less frightening. Its become so overwhelming at night recently, that I can't get to sleep anymore initally. I lay there fearful waiting for my heart to slow down, before I can go to sleep. Sometimes, I'll be woken shortly after to my heart racing again (like tonight), and this is always the worst feeling ever. I'll wake up gasping for air, afraid I'm dying and then notice my heart is racing really fast. Anxiety follows immediatly.

As I'm sitting here, my heart is going about 90bpm, so not dangerously fast or anything, in fact, I don't think it has ever reached a dangerously high level except maybe once. It is probably rare that it ever exceeds 120, but around 90 is pretty typical for these attacks...

I'm rambling, and I dont know who'll read this or think to reply. I'm here hoping to feel better...

I worry that I am dying, or am going to die soon. A constant racing heart cannot be healthy for a person. I was checking my heart randomly yesterday as I was relaxing on the computer (not anxious) and my heart rate was still fluctuating from 80-90. This scares me, that even as relaxed, it races. It adds to the fear that this is not anxiety, that the doctors must have overlooked something and that I am soon to be gone... :/

I started having palpitations last year, a dozen or more a day. My fears landed me in the ER where I thought I was dying one day when I had chest pains. They took an x-ray, ran an EKG and took blood work. They found nothing wrong. 1 month later I had a 24-hour holter, where they also found nothing. A cardiologist then suggested we get a Echo Cardiogram done just to furthur put my fears to rest, this also came back with nothing. In September, another ER visit... EKG, blood work and X-ray. Nothing. Even as I write this I feel embarrased for being here, like its obvious that there is nothing wrong with me. I can't really explain in a way to make it make sense... I just feel afraid for my life. The racing doesn't stop... Even when I'm relaxed. Occasionally, I will check my pulse and find it to be normal, which at the point I feel tremedous relief, but that is rare...

Anyone else going through similar? What have you done to assure yourself it is "just anxiety"? Do you honestly believe it is just anxiety, or are you afraid it's more than that? I'm tempted to go to my doctor after the holidays and request some new tests, of course I'm telling myself that it will be too late if I wait that long.

Nights like this are really horrible.

bjjr1977
12-20-2012, 05:42 AM
Been there done that, my heart-rate is high I also get palpitations daily!Ive had tests done on my heart and ended up in hospital with fast heart rates! December last year I called an ambulance and it was 170 when they arrived! Obsessive thoughts about your heart is an anxiety thing! I too wake with that gasp for air and feels like Im choking and my heart rate will be racing! You have too get a book called Hope and Help for Your Nerves by Claire Weekes
Im reading it now and beginning to understand what an over reactive nervous system does to your body! Its all about Nervous illness (anxiety)
We fear these alarming yet harmless body sensations Fear causes more adrenalin which causes your heart to get even further excited beats even more quickly
palpitations!!
get the book you'll learn a thing or two Your on the edge of your seat waiting for the heart to go giddy up so yes You are Nervous and Anxious even if You think you aren't!!

alankay
12-20-2012, 05:47 AM
Yep, anxiety. That's not all that fast but let's focus on the real issue. You are anxious.
Try to find out why by going to a counselor to talk over all this and your life past and present.
If there was anything wrong with your heart all those tests would have turned up something having done by a couple different docs. They are pretty darn good at finding physical problems. You are anxious.
PM me any time. Alankay

fletch127
12-20-2012, 05:54 AM
A heart attack would involve numbness on your arm and around your neck and you'll usually feel unwell for hours before hand. If you don't have those symptoms i'd say you are fine and just have to take deep breaths to settle yourself down.

defmunel
12-20-2012, 07:55 AM
Oh man. It sounds like I wrote this. I still worry about it, but I have a little more mental clarity. A racing heart has been my primary anxiety for the last 3 years. Before that I was worried about a heart attack. I was given extensive blood work, and my doc listened to my heartbeat and said everything was perfect. From then on, I haven't really worried about the heart attack issue anymore. I first began to worry about my pulse when a doctor told me it was elevated too high (163) when I was in for a sinus infection issue. I told her I had anxiety. She dismissed my comment by saying my hr should be 110 if I was nervous and that my hr "was not normal". Stupid dr. I hate her for saying those words. She demanded an EKG right there and would not let me leave til I had one. It was normal aside from the fast hr. I left in tears, traumatized. She never even addressed the issue of why I was there in the first place. Again, stupid dr. That visit began my pulse anxiety. I then began checking it constantly. Feeling every beat, noticing palpitations, hard heart beats. I worried myself sick. Finally found a great dr that listened and never worried about my hr. She prescribed me Xanax for those acute moments. I was good for a while. Then I got pregnant. Just the pregnancy itself caused so much anxiety. That was all based on my last experience, and I wasnt feeling ready to have that all happen again. Although at the time I didn't realize it. I began noticing my hr again. It was very elevated. It would be racing as soon as I woke in the morning. I'd also notice it most when I'm standing. I began to fret I had an autoimmune disorder. I googled and talked to people about it WAY too much. I was now living minute by minute, wishing everyday away and that God would take my pain and suffering away. Doctors would tell me that pregnancy causes a faster hr. I didn't believe them. I was too far gone on the anxiety level, although I didn't recognize it. If I was sitting, my hr was about 84-88. I was ok with that. Once I stood, it would be 108-125. Some drs told me I was dehydrated and two others confirmed my fears of the autoimmune disorder. Then I miscarried a week ago. Even through the sadness and sorrow I found comfort. Although it is a sad thing to have happen, I'm grateful that I now have a chance to find peace in my own soul, and work on my mental state before I try to get pregnant again. The day after I miscarried, I saw my cardiologist for the first time. They did orthostatic intolerance testing, and he said, absolutely NOT to the diagnosis I was given previously. That was nice to hear. I had logged my bp and hr for 2 weeks before I had the appt. I gave him the numbers, and he didn't seem to worries. They fluctuate about 15-20 bpm upon standing. Again, he wasn't worried. He told me he didn't want to pin anxiety on me. He wants to do all the tests. Echo, holter, and stress. Those are all scheduled in the future. Now, I feel a lot less anxious. I have more mental clarity. But my hr still fluctuates the same. I have decided that if my cardiologist isn't worried, then I wont be either. We are all made differently. I cannot change my heart beats. It's involuntary. But I can change the way I react to it. It sounds to me that you are in a high state of anxiety. Over a level 5. In that case, it is very hard to break the cycle. You must talk yourself down with rational thoughts. "I went to the cardiologist. All of my tests came back normal. My heart is healthy. I know I'm anxious. That is causing my heart to beat faster." opposed from the irrational thought, what of they missed something? What if I'm dying? These doctors have an extensive education, and knowledge. Neither you, or the Internet has such a medical education. You must put trust in the doctors that have helped you in the past and believe them. Hang in there. Pm me anytime.

PanicCured
12-20-2012, 08:57 AM
I get my heart past 150 bpm at the gym during sprints on purpose. It is called health and is a great way to strengthen your heart muscle. 120 bpm is the low end of a normal cardio exercise.
Try this when this happens next and report back if its better:

http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?9512-The-Quick-Guide-to-Stopping-Panic-Attacks

Jinaiya
12-20-2012, 09:47 AM
Thank you so much everyone for your responses. I feel better this morning than I did last night, but that it pretty typical. You are all correct when saying I need to stop checking my pulse. To be honest with you all, I dont normally start out by checking it. I feel my heart racing, which will lead me to check it, and then the anxiety will start up.

To answer Forwells: **What have you done to assure yourself it is "just anxiety"? Do you honestly believe it is just anxiety?** What has happened are the tests I've had, they are supposed to be reassuring. When I feel relaxed as I do right now, I feel fairly confidant I am ok, however, as soon as the racing begins, I feel otherwise about it. Sometimes when I am feeling ok, I'll think "next time your heart races, just dismiss it, it's not that scary"... But when it actually happens, it IS quite scary. I'll think "This time it's really it, my heart can't take much more of this, I'm sure of it!" It sucks...

@Bjr1977: I'll be sure to look into that book, thanks for the recommendation!

Thank you everyone for your resposes and sharing your experiences with me. This is why I love this forum, it makes me feel safe if that makes any sense.

PanicCured
12-20-2012, 10:08 AM
HEY HELLO!! Your heart is made to beat fast. Have you seen an athlete? Have you ever ran or lifted weights? Go ask the doctor how to make your heart stronger He will say exercise by getting your heart rate up. Get it out of your head that your heart can't take it. You got it all wrong! Stop always wanting reassurance that your heart won't explode. Have you ever heard of a marathon where their hearts are fast for hours on end? Do you hear people shouting in the street: "Oh my god! Stoop running. You will kill yourself! End the marathon! You're hearts cant take it!" NO! You don't hear anyone saying this. When I had anxiety my heart would get to 162 bpm. Still not dangerous. So you go to a doctor, get checked out for anything irregular, and if you did all the tests like an Echocardiogram and they say you are normal then your normal. But please, understand heart beating 90 bpm during an anxiety attack is not dangerous!

Sorry if I'm being harsh but you got to snap out of this.

Stop tripping yourself out and do this method. If you don't do this method I will assume you aren't willing to take the proper action. Just do this: http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?9512-The-Quick-Guide-to-Stopping-Panic-Attacks

JeepersCreepers
12-20-2012, 11:04 PM
I'm not entirely sure what to do to convince yourself it's anxiety, but I know that I personally work myself up sometimes just by being aware of the rhythm.. It seems the minute I pay attention it begins to skip beats, flutter, explode. Do you obsess over the health of your heart at all?

And great advice, forwells!

anxietygirl143
12-20-2012, 11:10 PM
I'm not entirely sure what to do to convince yourself it's anxiety, but I know that I personally work myself up sometimes just by being aware of the rhythm.. It seems the minute I pay attention it begins to skip beats, flutter, explode. Do you obsess over the health of your heart at all?

And great advice, forwells!

Omg !! Same here :/

laurandisorder
12-20-2012, 11:47 PM
I have had to accept that my heart rate is naturally rapid - I'm not sure what this means. I downloaded a heart rate monitor on my phone - much to my skepticism, but after testing it over 20 times on different people with my Mum's assistance (she's a nurse), it's super accurate and my heart rate rarely drops below 88 bpm even whilst resting.

When I have an anxiety attack it rockets up to a resting rate of 140 bpm. It is merely a symptom of anxiety, as are palpitations and it isn't much to worry about. As PanicCured pointed out athletes and anyone who wants to improve their cardio health has to work out to get their heart up to this rate. You're only looking at a real problem if your heart rate is reaching 180+ bpm for over 10 minutes at a time.

Even after working out, then getting anxious I have only gotten to a maximum of 167.

I hope this alleviates some of your fears.

PanicCured
12-21-2012, 09:17 PM
Paniccure gets these pains also now but because he is calm now he can pull himself out of it very quickly without feeding into the panic .

No this is not true. I RARELY feel any anxiety or any of the symptoms at all. It isn't like I feel it but I learned to deal with them. It is rare I feel it at all. Like I said, my heart skipping beats is the only symptom I have not cured yet and it's annoying sometimes, sometimes I get a little scared and other times I don't care. But I am not saying I have no fear, but some anxious thoughts occur, but very rarely, I mean a few times a year I may get some anxiety feelings, that quickly will pass. Usually I drank a lot the night before or something.

In all of 2012, I remember twice that I felt a panic attack could have come on if I didn't know how to handle it. One time I was really hung over, the other time I drank a lot and was around an insane amount of second hand smoke in China, in a windowless huge room filled with people smoking that had me breathing all weird. Then I was laying in bed I felt my heart start to beat faster, then I just laid there and did my method and it went away. But it didn't go into full panic. So in 2012 I did not have 1 panic attack, and there were only 2-3 times where it close to one. But feeling panic or anxiety or scared once in a great while I wold think is normal. That is not a disorder. That is a normal human emotion. The disoroder is when it as taken over your life or at least hindered it in some way. The bottom line is, I do not have the disorder anymore.

But I just remembered this as Im typing this: I actually did panic one time in 2012. I took an enormous bong hit of the strongest pot known to man. I mean, this stuff was the primo of the primo with hash on top of it that was 75% THC. It was like stronger than what Snoop Dog even smokes. I got so damn high I felt like I was Gumby walking around South Park. I was vibrating. I actually did freak out and took a valume. So I did get way too stoned and had a stoned kind of anxiety attack. I don't think I ever smoked anything weed on that level before. I pretty much laid down and talked to my friends and drank lots of water.

PanicCured
12-21-2012, 09:21 PM
I have had to accept that my heart rate is naturally rapid - I'm not sure what this means. I downloaded a heart rate monitor on my phone - much to my skepticism, but after testing it over 20 times on different people with my Mum's assistance (she's a nurse), it's super accurate and my heart rate rarely drops below 88 bpm even whilst resting.
Usually a resting heart rate under 70 bpm, is a sign of good cardiovascular health. Take your pulse as soon as you wake up. If your is 88, maybe see if you can do certain things to improve your cardio health like exercise and eating good and being at a normal weight.

laurandisorder
12-22-2012, 01:59 AM
Thanks PC. I'm pretty underweight - rather significantly for my height, but I try to exercise and eat quite well on the whole.

Plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables, not too many carbs or too much junk or caffeine, but quite a bit of sugar. I haven't been keeping up my exercise very well lately as I have had stitches in my foot and haven't been able to run for the past three months. I am going to start some yoga and pilates with meditation in the new year which I am looking forward to.

I will get my quick heart rate checked out in the new year at my next check up appointment with my GP because it seems pretty consistent - even when I am not that anxious. I do accept that an elevated heart rate is a symptom of anxiety, but I'm not anxious ALL the time.

I know we're all different, but it's always best to be on the safe side.

sandyrdh1
12-22-2012, 08:37 AM
I have suffered from anxiety do many years. It started with fast heart rate and panic. Then for the last 5 months it is always skipping beats. I now take a beta blocker for the fast heart rate but it sure does not stop the skipping. It's so annoying. Sometimes I barley feel it and other times it is stronger and kinda hurts or pinches when it skipps. I wish I new how to stop them. It really stresses me out more and scares me when there strong.