Bluesookie
12-14-2012, 04:42 AM
Hello everyone,
I'm not really sure this is the place to post this but I couldn't think of any place else.
I'm a teacher (I teach adults) and recently something rather unpleasant happened. I was marking the final tests from the class and, to my surprise, I find in the last answer of one test an invitation for coffee. I mean, he was asking if I would have coffee with him and if I accept it if we could schedule it for one of these days. Honest. He wrote this on the test that I was marking and that I was going to grade.
Naturally, I was not happy, especially given the way he chose to ask it. The test is a document to be graded, not facebook.
I also wouldn't like it if he had sent it to my email but, at least, the context would've been more appropriate. The content would still be bad. I have a policy of not going out with students (coffee or whatever) and I think that would the right thing to do, even though some colleagues think it's ok because they're adults. Yes, they are adults but we're still teachers that evaluate their work.
Now, obviously, I will have to confront him with this. I'm thinking of just writting on the test that it is completely out of context and that the test is only to answer questions, nothing more.
My problem is that I tend to feel guilty when I reject people. Even in this case that the reason has nothing to do with feeling attracted or not.
I have a huge fear of rejection and I think that might make me have these guilty feelings when I do that to someone.
Does that ever happen to any of you?
thanks for reading
I'm not really sure this is the place to post this but I couldn't think of any place else.
I'm a teacher (I teach adults) and recently something rather unpleasant happened. I was marking the final tests from the class and, to my surprise, I find in the last answer of one test an invitation for coffee. I mean, he was asking if I would have coffee with him and if I accept it if we could schedule it for one of these days. Honest. He wrote this on the test that I was marking and that I was going to grade.
Naturally, I was not happy, especially given the way he chose to ask it. The test is a document to be graded, not facebook.
I also wouldn't like it if he had sent it to my email but, at least, the context would've been more appropriate. The content would still be bad. I have a policy of not going out with students (coffee or whatever) and I think that would the right thing to do, even though some colleagues think it's ok because they're adults. Yes, they are adults but we're still teachers that evaluate their work.
Now, obviously, I will have to confront him with this. I'm thinking of just writting on the test that it is completely out of context and that the test is only to answer questions, nothing more.
My problem is that I tend to feel guilty when I reject people. Even in this case that the reason has nothing to do with feeling attracted or not.
I have a huge fear of rejection and I think that might make me have these guilty feelings when I do that to someone.
Does that ever happen to any of you?
thanks for reading