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randomanxiety
12-13-2012, 05:11 AM
I was diagnosed with GAD and panic attacks.
I was at school in class one day and all of a sudden I started feeling hot sweaty and cold all at the same time?, my mind started racing with feelings of impending doom and I thought I was going to be sick to my stomach. I had no idea what was happening but I felt like if I did not leave right that very moment, I was going to embarrass myself! I went to see my doctor who diagnosed it as a panic attack. I was put on 75mg of Effexor and she talked to me about breathing techniques I could use to help calm myself.

The next day at school was a nightmare! The idea of knowing I was stuck in a class with hundreds of people that I had to climb over to be able to get out was excruciating and caused many feelings of anxiety (P.S. Breathing did nothing, LoL). Needless to say school became a learning curve all in itself, never mind going to class to learn, I had to learn how to just sit in class without anxiety. This was not an easy task, and I failed. Back at the doctor my dosage was increased and it took some determination on my part to get through it all. After about 6months on the higher dosage (75+37.5mg) I started to really master my anxiety YaY! I have to say that self talk was what helped me the most, so if talking to your self is crazy then lock me up, because I do not plan on stopping any time soon.

It is now over a decade later and about 6months ago I hit an all time low. The company that I work for became financially unstable. I was put in charge of laying off many employees I had worked with for a number of years. I came home that night and while I was in the shower my heart started racing and pounding out of my chest, I could not catch my breath no matter what breathing technique I tried. I sat on the floor of my bathtub trying to gasp for breath and calm my pounding heart but nothing worked. It was pounding so hard I thought I was having a heart attack I literally felt like I was dying! I decided to go to the hospital since I had never experienced anything like that before and was really scared. They did an EKG and a chest x-ray that showed nothing abnormal. The doctor told me that it was probably a panic attack with new symptoms I had not experienced before. He said to make an appointment with my regular GP to discuss changes in medication.
Back at my doctor again, I was told that the new stress from my job was a trigger for my anxiety to resurface. My medication was increased to 150mg and my doctor sent me to a therapist. I was lucky and got a super nice lady that gave me a lot of reading material to educate myself about my GAD. I learned that that first of all anxiety is a normal body response that every human has. It is the situation I am in that I have to question, and figure out if it warrants my anxiety. Secondly that all the symptoms I experience are not going to kill me! As frightening as they may be they will soon pass and I can move on.
The problem is convincing my brain of this, lol. since my otherwise predictable and manageable panic attacks have become random and the normal symptoms I experienced previously are now out of control! Along with my previous symptoms I was experiencing I was now suffering from trouble breathing to the point of almost passing out, unable to swallowing (feeling like something was stuck in my throat), pounding heart beat that felt like a heart attack and sweating until I was soaking wet! I could always feel a panic attack coming on before and would begin my ritual of self talk to reassure myself that I would make it through this. This new breed of panic comes out of nowhere and the symptoms are way more intense. I guess what I mean is that it was easier to control when I could feel it starting small. I also knew what my triggers were and could almost prepare myself ahead of time to know I would be triggering an attack and to just stay the course to get through it. Now however there is no pattern or reason for the ones I experience and the symptoms do not ever start small they just come on like a title wave!
I really hate this experience. I also feel like my medication does nothing any more so what is the point of being on it if it does not help. Everything in my life suffers because of my GAD my family, my friends, and my basic general interest in life. It is not fair, I want my life back!
Can anyone help with random panic attacks? Does anyone else experience them with no triggers? How can I handle them better?
Thank you for taking the time to read my story:) I hope that some of you can relate and know that you are not alone in this.

temperancebrennan
12-13-2012, 02:57 PM
Reading your post, I feel like I could have written the exact same thing.
I am currently trying to listen to relaxation tapes and steady my breathing, whilst being prescribed citalopram. (my previous 3 medications did not really work)
The only thing I found that can take my mind off things was to pluck my eyebrows (sounds weird I know) but even that isn't helping any more.

I hope someone can give us some tips. It's so difficult to lead a normal life with constant attacks & the worry that another is going to happen.

randomanxiety
12-15-2012, 02:46 AM
Its funny you mention plucking your eyebrows, lol. I actually do that too. I will sit in front of my make up mirror and do my eyebrows and once those are done I will look for other things to fix. I look for any imperfections, sometimes I go to far and make a mess of my face and worry about how I will look the next day :(

SunnieDebris
12-15-2012, 03:01 AM
Randomanxiety,

Props to you for taking control of your situation. You went to the ER when you got scared, you followed up with your doctor, you're taking your meds as prescribed, and you're doing tough work with a great therapist (congrats on finding a good one). I know that things seem out of control right now, but you are doing all the right things! Keep going! My only suggestion to you and temperance both, is to tell your therapists about the picking of the eyebrows. That may be tricotilomania, which is an anxiety disorder that causes a person to pick at the hair on their head or face. It's important for them to know about that in order to treat you fully. I wish you nothing but the best!

randomanxiety
12-15-2012, 03:13 AM
Thanks for the support Sunnie!
I have mentioned this to my therapist and discussed the possibility of tricotilomania. Which I was initially scared of however she has told me that people with that disorder tend to over do it to the point of taking out all their eyebrows! scary! the one I do have to worry about is the looking for imperfections. I get carried away and become obssessive, sometimes I look for areas to pick that people wont see or that I can cover with clothes. It is the obsessive then hiding it part that worries her. I am working on it, slowly but surely I will overcome that too :)

hlucy
12-30-2012, 03:54 AM
Its so relieving to see that other people are experiencing the same problem as me. A few months back when i as finishing college i had 2 trips to the ER thinking i was having a heart attack, couldnt breath, chest pains, palpitations, numbness... I thought i was going to die. My doctor gave me A small dose of valium which i found wasnt enough....a few months went by i was fine then one night a panic attack woke me and i didnt sleep for hours... Im quite stressed and having difficulty finding a job which is depressing me, but this past week ive had 2 anxiety attacks and i dont know what to do apart from freak out and hope it will pass. Can nicotine be a trigger for anxiety? My partner says i should 'see someone' but i dont know who... I feel very alone

granty
12-30-2012, 12:15 PM
It weird one minute ur laughing and fine then the next ur panicking its mad

Ivere
12-30-2012, 01:25 PM
It weird one minute ur laughing and fine then the next ur panicking its mad

I'm exactly the same!