gungadin09
12-06-2012, 01:11 AM
This happened a year ago: I got a crush on a poster (different website). I told him I had a crush on him. He politely rebuffed me. As in, he deflected, without saying yes or no. A couple of months later, I was seriously stressing out and he tried to help me. He also told me he thought I was schizophrenic. He was subtle, though, he didn't come right out and say it. (Subtlety is sort of his M.O.) I figured that's what he meant, though, and I replied "I'm not schizophrenic". I gave an explanation of why what he thought was psychosis wasn't. He didn't believe me. I started to believe I really had schizophrenia. I told him I would go to the doctor.
Turns out I don't have schizophrenia, or at least the psychologist I've been seeing for almost a year doesn't think so. She said anxiety and possibly manic depression.
Recently, the guy I had a crush on has hooked up with another girl from the same forum. (I know this is probably starting to sound like an episode of Jerry Springer.) The guy got kicked off the forum, but the girl still posts there. I still have a crush on him, and I'm a little obsessed with him, his girlfriend, and their other friend who also posts on the forums. (He's still kicked off.) I didn't tell either the girlfriend or the friend that I had a crush on the guy, but I think they figured it out, because I was responding to a lot of their posts, and I started talking like him, I guess. He's very opinionated and has these distinctive ideas, and since I had a crush on him I started agreeing with a lot of his ideas, and I guess I started to sound a little too much like him. I think that started to creep out the girlfriend and the friend. I don't know for sure because neither of them said anything to me, but I just get the feeling that I said too much and maybe they figured out that I had a crush on this guy. (Yes, I know this sounds really stupid and high schoolish, but I'm upset about it, so bear with me, okay. And, yes, I know it's stupid to have such a big crush on some guy on the internet who I've never seen or even talked to much.) I didn't say anything threatening or angry, I was just responding to their posts a lot more than before.
So, I was a little too obvious about my crush, and I think it creeped them out, probably even more so since he thinks I have schizophrenia and may have told them. I'm afraid they think I'm cyber-stalking the girlfriend. I stopped responding to their posts and stopped repeating his ideas when I post, because I don't want to upset anyone. Again, I don't know that they are upset, I just get that feeling. I got an email from him out of the blue. I think he was trying to figure out whether there was something wrong with me. Again, he didn't some right out and say it, but that was the impression that I got. I responded to the email, and never got a message back. I'm sure he thinks I'm off my rocker.
I feel terrible about all this, and I'm going to steer clear of all three, because I really didn't intend to upset anyone. But I feel like such a freak. Any words of wisdom?
Pam
Turns out I don't have schizophrenia, or at least the psychologist I've been seeing for almost a year doesn't think so. She said anxiety and possibly manic depression.
Recently, the guy I had a crush on has hooked up with another girl from the same forum. (I know this is probably starting to sound like an episode of Jerry Springer.) The guy got kicked off the forum, but the girl still posts there. I still have a crush on him, and I'm a little obsessed with him, his girlfriend, and their other friend who also posts on the forums. (He's still kicked off.) I didn't tell either the girlfriend or the friend that I had a crush on the guy, but I think they figured it out, because I was responding to a lot of their posts, and I started talking like him, I guess. He's very opinionated and has these distinctive ideas, and since I had a crush on him I started agreeing with a lot of his ideas, and I guess I started to sound a little too much like him. I think that started to creep out the girlfriend and the friend. I don't know for sure because neither of them said anything to me, but I just get the feeling that I said too much and maybe they figured out that I had a crush on this guy. (Yes, I know this sounds really stupid and high schoolish, but I'm upset about it, so bear with me, okay. And, yes, I know it's stupid to have such a big crush on some guy on the internet who I've never seen or even talked to much.) I didn't say anything threatening or angry, I was just responding to their posts a lot more than before.
So, I was a little too obvious about my crush, and I think it creeped them out, probably even more so since he thinks I have schizophrenia and may have told them. I'm afraid they think I'm cyber-stalking the girlfriend. I stopped responding to their posts and stopped repeating his ideas when I post, because I don't want to upset anyone. Again, I don't know that they are upset, I just get that feeling. I got an email from him out of the blue. I think he was trying to figure out whether there was something wrong with me. Again, he didn't some right out and say it, but that was the impression that I got. I responded to the email, and never got a message back. I'm sure he thinks I'm off my rocker.
I feel terrible about all this, and I'm going to steer clear of all three, because I really didn't intend to upset anyone. But I feel like such a freak. Any words of wisdom?
Pam