Hello - Health Anxiety

[sunnythinks]

Hello, everyone. I'd like to begin by saying that this is my first time on an anxiety forum; I had been reading the posts here for a while and finally decided to share my experiences, which I hope I'm doing in the right place.

First, a little about me. I am a 21 year old female college student. I enjoy school, and also have a job while on campus. I have a history of sadness and don't cope well with stress, but I have never been formally diagnosed by a doctor because my family could not afford health insurance.

Perhaps because of this, I have always been a something of a hypochondriac. It never bothered me too much until recently, when I learned that two people I went to school with (one younger, one about a year older) passed away. From there, I started experiencing a wide variety of "symptoms," mostly related to constipation, loss of appetite, and mild nausea. Some were more worrisome because I'd never experienced them; these were the constant feeling of a lump in my throat and headaches from clenching my jaw during the day and while sleeping.

So, I eventually realize that my "symptoms" are essentially psychosomatic. I thought too hard about being sick and made it so. I've been working on that, but I can't shake the obsession with illness. I work in a social job, and two people were sick today; I worked myself into a stomach ache over it, and I felt so pathetic. I kept thinking about catching their colds or stomach viruses, and it made my stomach upset! Ugh!

My boyfriend is sweet for putting up with me, but he says I have to stop this thinking pattern on my own. I don't know how. I feel like I'm going crazy, and it frustrates me. I don't want to think like this!

[natuhhleee]

If you tell yourself so much that you have pain in your stomach (when you don't) you will get pain in your stomach. It's so annoying but, it means that your mind is really strong if it can "create" these symptoms on its own.

With a mind that powerful, it should be easy to reverse these thoughts and get you back to living your life.

Separate fact from hypotheses. If your head hurts, chest hurts, or anything for that matter, write down why you think this. Are there facts to support what you are thinking is true? Or are you just freaking out?

I know the feeling and its so hard. Just challenge yourself.

[alankay]

Does you college have a student health service covered by tuition? Many do so ask about it. Maybe counseling or an ssri would help you and be covered. Just an idea. Alankay

[sunnythinks]

Does you college have a student health service covered by tuition? Many do so ask about it. Maybe counseling or an ssri would help you and be covered. Just an idea. Alankay

Unfortunately, our health service is limited to wellness exams, emergencies and the like. While we do have "counseling," we are limited to six sessions to evaluate our condition, after which we will be referred to specialists outside the university.

I did go to one session, but the counselor seemed determined to ask about my past, and I feel he was trying to have me invent false abuse or mommy/daddy issues that I really don't have. (-｡-;)

[sunnythinks]

If you tell yourself so much that you have pain in your stomach (when you don't) you will get pain in your stomach. It's so annoying but, it means that your mind is really strong if it can "create" these symptoms on its own.

With a mind that powerful, it should be easy to reverse these thoughts and get you back to living your life.

Separate fact from hypotheses. If your head hurts, chest hurts, or anything for that matter, write down why you think this. Are there facts to support what you are thinking is true? Or are you just freaking out?

I know the feeling and its so hard. Just challenge yourself.

I've found that writing definitely helps, but it's not something I can do in class or at work. I still obsess over falling I'll when I find out that a coworker is sick. It can be very frustrating!

[star1234]

Don't waste your youth obsessing about something you can't control. If your going to get sick their is nothing you can do about. I'm sorry to hear that your school friends passed but I'm sure you know it doesn't mean it's going to happen to you. I can relate. My mom passed two months ago from heart disease. Since then I started to get anxiety and chest pains. Have been checked and I'm fine. I'm going for a third opinion and then I'm done. I'm not going to deprive myself or my family from being happy. If I die I die I won't live to know that I died so why worry? No one wants to die young but we can't control it. You might be protecting yourself from picking up any kind of virus or infection, but tomorrow you might get hit by a car. Then you worried for nothing. Enjoy your life you only get one.

[sunnythinks]

Don't waste your youth obsessing about something you can't control. If your going to get sick their is nothing you can do about. I'm sorry to hear that your school friends passed but I'm sure you know it doesn't mean it's going to happen to you. I can relate. My mom passed two months ago from heart disease. Since then I started to get anxiety and chest pains. Have been checked and I'm fine. I'm going for a third opinion and then I'm done. I'm not going to deprive myself or my family from being happy. If I die I die I won't live to know that I died so why worry? No one wants to die young but we can't control it. You might be protecting yourself from picking up any kind of virus or infection, but tomorrow you might get hit by a car. Then you worried for nothing. Enjoy your life you only get one.

Thank you for your kind words. I realize that you are correct, and am going to try and focus on enjoying the moment, instead of being so afraid. I am sick of this fear, and I don't want to waste my time being afraid.

[mommyof2]

I too am I hypochondriac. Back in highschool one of my close friends died in his sleep and ever since then I have been worrying about every single thing. Every time I hear someone get diagnosed with something I automatically assume I have it and start getting worked up about it. It has def taken over my life and it sucks. If you need someone to talk to I am here if need be :)

[sunnythinks]

I too am I hypochondriac. Back in highschool one of my close friends died in his sleep and ever since then I have been worrying about every single thing. Every time I hear someone get diagnosed with something I automatically assume I have it and start getting worked up about it. It has def taken over my life and it sucks. If you need someone to talk to I am here if need be :)

Yes, that's exactly it! It seems as though when I hear about a death I focus on it and get scared. I feel so ridiculous. At work, I have to come in contact with a lot of people; well, there's been a cold going around and I've been scaring myself about it. I think, what if I catch it? What if it's something else? What if there are complications? I guess ultimately I'm scared of dying a horrible death. My grandfather died of cancer and it stayed with me, and now I'm paranoid. I've been thinking I've got a fever all day and am giving myself a stomachache and a headache...ugh. :(

[ilovejake]

Yes, that's exactly it! It seems as though when I hear about a death I focus on it and get scared. I feel so ridiculous. At work, I have to come in contact with a lot of people; well, there's been a cold going around and I've been scaring myself about it. I think, what if I catch it? What if it's something else? What if there are complications? I guess ultimately I'm scared of dying a horrible death. My grandfather died of cancer and it stayed with me, and now I'm paranoid. I've been thinking I've got a fever all day and am giving myself a stomachache and a headache...ugh. :(

One of my best friends in middle school had cancer. Since I was so close to her, I began worrying about cancer. After she passed away it was really hard on me. Once I started getting frequent headaches, I was afraid I had brain cancer like she did. Since then I've been so caught up on the fact that I have cancer so I feel tons of weird symptoms. I wish our bodies weren't so powerful and allowed this to happen :( it makes me afraid something far worse is wrong when it isn't.

[sunnythinks]

One of my best friends in middle school had cancer. Since I was so close to her, I began worrying about cancer. After she passed away it was really hard on me. Once I started getting frequent headaches, I was afraid I had brain cancer like she did. Since then I've been so caught up on the fact that I have cancer so I feel tons of weird symptoms. I wish our bodies weren't so powerful and allowed this to happen :( it makes me afraid something far worse is wrong when it isn't.

I understand exactly what you mean. I, too, experience a variety of weird symptoms. I'm so afraid of coming down with something that I'm making myself feel sick. I wish it didn't have to be this way. I'm starting to notice the most ridiculous things about my body, and it's making me feel crazy. :(

[ilovejake]

I understand exactly what you mean. I, too, experience a variety of weird symptoms. I'm so afraid of coming down with something that I'm making myself feel sick. I wish it didn't have to be this way. I'm starting to notice the most ridiculous things about my body, and it's making me feel crazy. :(

I know how you feel! I seem to notice new things about my body all the time. It has gotten better since I started taking medication though. So I guess there is always hope! And we aren't alone in this, so we can push through it.