I think my spirit is dying

[Kowli]

I feel I don't have any motivation any more to start over. I'm in a transition period, between jobs and I feel so anxious about everything. I've never been in such a situation before. I feel I'm going through a crisis. I've been building a new identity for myself with what I was doing and by loosing it, I think I don't know who I am anymore or what I want from life. I'm getting 35 soon and I feel I'm too old for anything new. Other people think that I'm an smart and talented person with lots of achievements. But I feel quite the opposite. I woke up today by a dizziness that led to a headache and I think it's because of my anxiety. Most of my dreams are unpleasant and when I get up, I still feel tired. The future seems so dark. I even don't like to leave home. I don't think the works that I'm doing are useful or would bring me any satisfaction. Once, I enjoyed writing and publishing my articles (I'm a journalist) but it doesn't feel good anymore. I should say, I had a very hard summer and I had to withdraw from the school at the end of summer. It was a very critical time for me. And still I suffer from what happened, it makes me very sad and frustrated. I moved to a new place and lost my regular contacts with my friends. What should I do? I cannot console myself. I'm lucky that I've a very caring husband but I don't want to be a depressed wife.

[ali_diaj]

You sound like you have alot going for yourself, I completely understand where you're coming from I wake up nautious every morning, I'm not happy in my life. Every new medication I try I read the side effects and once that happens it's all over from there my body starts to have every single one of the bad side effects so I stop taking the meds. It seems like I will never be happy again, Im so tired of it. We have to take our lives back and not allow the anxiety and depression to win. You can do it, you have so much more life in you and this is not how God intended for us to live it. Take care and have faith, you can overcome this!

[star1234]

I suffer from depression and anxiety too. I'm older then you and I'm married too. I know that it's never to late to make changes in your life especially positive ones. It's easier when you don't have small children. I don't want to live depressed and I don't want to deprive my children their mom. All I can do is fight it. I will fight it for me and I will fight it for them. I deserve better and they deserve better. If your a journalist writing should help you. I keep a journal. It's full of tears but it helps me vent. It always understands me and doesn't speak back. I stated going for therapy last week and I know I will make myself better. You can too!

[rcohn20]

I feel I don't have any motivation any more to start over. I'm in a transition period, between jobs and I feel so anxious about everything. I've never been in such a situation before. I feel I'm going through a crisis. I've been building a new identity for myself with what I was doing and by loosing it, I think I don't know who I am anymore or what I want from life. I'm getting 35 soon and I feel I'm too old for anything new. Other people think that I'm an smart and talented person with lots of achievements. But I feel quite the opposite. I woke up today by a dizziness that led to a headache and I think it's because of my anxiety. Most of my dreams are unpleasant and when I get up, I still feel tired. The future seems so dark. I even don't like to leave home. I don't think the works that I'm doing are useful or would bring me any satisfaction. Once, I enjoyed writing and publishing my articles (I'm a journalist) but it doesn't feel good anymore. I should say, I had a very hard summer and I had to withdraw from the school at the end of summer. It was a very critical time for me. And still I suffer from what happened, it makes me very sad and frustrated. I moved to a new place and lost my regular contacts with my friends. What should I do? I cannot console myself. I'm lucky that I've a very caring husband but I don't want to be a depressed wife.

I know exactly how you feel....it's definitely depression

[rcohn20]

I feel I don't have any motivation any more to start over. I'm in a transition period, between jobs and I feel so anxious about everything. I've never been in such a situation before. I feel I'm going through a crisis. I've been building a new identity for myself with what I was doing and by loosing it, I think I don't know who I am anymore or what I want from life. I'm getting 35 soon and I feel I'm too old for anything new. Other people think that I'm an smart and talented person with lots of achievements. But I feel quite the opposite. I woke up today by a dizziness that led to a headache and I think it's because of my anxiety. Most of my dreams are unpleasant and when I get up, I still feel tired. The future seems so dark. I even don't like to leave home. I don't think the works that I'm doing are useful or would bring me any satisfaction. Once, I enjoyed writing and publishing my articles (I'm a journalist) but it doesn't feel good anymore. I should say, I had a very hard summer and I had to withdraw from the school at the end of summer. It was a very critical time for me. And still I suffer from what happened, it makes me very sad and frustrated. I moved to a new place and lost my regular contacts with my friends. What should I do? I cannot console myself. I'm lucky that I've a very caring husband but I don't want to be a depressed wife.

I know how you feel-it's depression and it's debilitating...please don't give up on the things that once brought you so much joy! Maybe you just need to take a break and refresh. Also, therapy can help...in particularly from a psychologist who does cognitive behavioral therapy. Just remember you're not alone-others are dealing with the same thing that you are...and most importantly they've come out on top! You will too! Be kind to yourself...we've all been through difficult times.

[natuhhleee]

Those feeling are so hard to deal with. Feeling hopeless about the future because anxiety is holding you back from having a fulfilling life.
Take a few moments to enjoy the little things, write on sticky notes positive things about yourself and put them on your wall next to your bed so you start the day with looking at them.

[dazza]

Those feeling are so hard to deal with. Feeling hopeless about the future because anxiety is holding you back from having a fulfilling life.
Take a few moments to enjoy the little things, write on sticky notes positive things about yourself and put them on your wall next to your bed so you start the day with looking at them.

Just a little food for thought here...

It's not always anxiety that holds people back from their future lives. It's often the thought of the future which causes anxiety.

Some people end up planted in a situation that perhaps they THOUGHT they wanted, but deep down - they didn't.

2 examples:

1/ A person goes for a great paying but stressful job. OK, so the money is great but the stress is completely shit and ruins their life.
The thought of the future with this company causes anxiety.

- A wrong choice given this person is naturally unsuited to high stress.

2/ A person THINKS they should be married, have kids, have their own house etc. So they do... conforming to what society and peers expect of them.
Once in this often highly stressful situation, they're stressed to the eyeballs and anxiety disorder strikes.

- Again, on the face of it, the "normal" choice, but perhaps the wrong one for this person.

Just a thought.