how to deal with social situations

[onedayatatime]

I frequently watch sports and my boyfriend coaches and plays as well. When I go and watch him coach, his ex gf from 4 years ago is there coaching along side. They were friends before and dated for 8 months. It gives me severe anxiety. I've had to leave several times and blame my early dismissal on other things. They have been coaching together for about 5 years.

I need to face this demon. I need to stop the panic attacks, the anxiety attacks, the empty pit in my stomach when I see them together. They have each dated other people since. He's a wonderful man, but I feel so left out of that world. He always calls me after games and practices and we see each other most of the week. I was in a 2 year relationship 2 years ago and my ex bf cheated on me several times. His ex gf also said a lot of negative things about me and when I asked him to talk to her, he never did. I ended up in therapy after the breakup.

I'm thinking of listening to some self help audio through my phone during their games, but I don't know of any.

Any suggestions? The next game is next week and I'm already having severe anxiety and a minor panic attack thinking of it.

Marni.

[mw0929]

Have you talked to him about how you feel? I know that open communication is pretty important in a relationship. Try explaining to him how it makes you uncomfortable. If he is in it for the long haul, he should be comforting, reassuring, and understanding. It may not change the coaching situation but it could give you peace of mind that there is nothing more going on between them than a business relationship. I hope it works out for you!

[onedayatatime]

We've talked about it several times. He even went as far as saying he'd fire her, but I don't want that. I don't want to ruin her life, affect the players, and look like the insecure girlfriend. I know that this is all on me. I'm just trying to figure out how I can stay calm and enjoy the games. Watching them so close together while coaching makes me uneasy. They have a strong friendship and I hate it.

Thank you for reading.

Marni.