Peak
11-04-2012, 03:23 AM
This is something that has bugged me for many years to the point where I don't know if the symptoms I have are caused by anxiety or are causing anxiety.
A lot of people on here clearly suffer from anxiety in the traditional sense in that they feel anxious about something and that causes physical symptoms and/or prevents them from performing everyday tasks etc. I on the other hand am rarely aware of feeling anxious.
Here's the thing. I first started getting palpitations about 15 years ago when I thought I had cancer. I was so scared and so stressed that I was getting palps all the time. After eventually seeing a doctor I was told it wasn't cancer and the sense of relief was incredible & the palps stopped and went away for about 10 years.
7 years ago my wife & I started having fertility treatment which was obviously quite stressful but I didn't think it was affecting me that much. That said when it came to an end and we found out we couldn't have children it hit me an awful lot harder than I thought and I ended up going for counselling for this and also for other matters. The other matters where a lot of childhood traumas and family traumas which have permanently torn my family apart which the whole childless thing had unearthed again after I had buried in my brain for 30+ years.
It was whilst going through fertility treatment that I started having palps again which just come and go every few weeks lasting a few weeks at a time. It was during the time I was having counselling I started to also get panic attacks completely out of the blue.
Today though I don't really consider myself as someone who feels anxious. I feel accepting of the fact that I won't ever have kids but yeah there are the occasional day here and there where it makes me feel sad & even a little panicked. The family traumas I know will never be resolved but on a day to day basis I don't think of them and they don't affect me but yes there are times of the year or when a particular person calls or I see them that I do feel very stressed & this comes on very quickly. I know that I have a lot of unresolved anger there. So day to day I don't think of any if this stuff, it doesn't bother me etc but I keep getting episodes of palps etc which my doctor says in all anxiety.
Does anyone else feel that they pretty much only feel anxious when they get the physical symptoms of anxiety when generally they feel pretty "normal"? On the one hand I can understand how someone going through what I've gone through could feel anxious but on the other hand I imagine someone whose anxious as being someone that can't cope, that can't function day to day. But I can. Sure there are days when I would like to give up & stay in bed but I know it's not an option & not really what I want to do. So confused!
A lot of people on here clearly suffer from anxiety in the traditional sense in that they feel anxious about something and that causes physical symptoms and/or prevents them from performing everyday tasks etc. I on the other hand am rarely aware of feeling anxious.
Here's the thing. I first started getting palpitations about 15 years ago when I thought I had cancer. I was so scared and so stressed that I was getting palps all the time. After eventually seeing a doctor I was told it wasn't cancer and the sense of relief was incredible & the palps stopped and went away for about 10 years.
7 years ago my wife & I started having fertility treatment which was obviously quite stressful but I didn't think it was affecting me that much. That said when it came to an end and we found out we couldn't have children it hit me an awful lot harder than I thought and I ended up going for counselling for this and also for other matters. The other matters where a lot of childhood traumas and family traumas which have permanently torn my family apart which the whole childless thing had unearthed again after I had buried in my brain for 30+ years.
It was whilst going through fertility treatment that I started having palps again which just come and go every few weeks lasting a few weeks at a time. It was during the time I was having counselling I started to also get panic attacks completely out of the blue.
Today though I don't really consider myself as someone who feels anxious. I feel accepting of the fact that I won't ever have kids but yeah there are the occasional day here and there where it makes me feel sad & even a little panicked. The family traumas I know will never be resolved but on a day to day basis I don't think of them and they don't affect me but yes there are times of the year or when a particular person calls or I see them that I do feel very stressed & this comes on very quickly. I know that I have a lot of unresolved anger there. So day to day I don't think of any if this stuff, it doesn't bother me etc but I keep getting episodes of palps etc which my doctor says in all anxiety.
Does anyone else feel that they pretty much only feel anxious when they get the physical symptoms of anxiety when generally they feel pretty "normal"? On the one hand I can understand how someone going through what I've gone through could feel anxious but on the other hand I imagine someone whose anxious as being someone that can't cope, that can't function day to day. But I can. Sure there are days when I would like to give up & stay in bed but I know it's not an option & not really what I want to do. So confused!