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ILoveConorMaynard
10-30-2012, 11:32 AM
Hello!

I have finally actually been diagnosed with a eating disorder, along with this I also suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. I have to see a specialist asap when they call me as doctor has made it urgent. I struggle everyday with all this, can hardly eat anything, I weigh 21kg less then I should. I have just recently started college and I love it. However, last week I suffered with anxiety attacks and it really knocked me back, Im so worried that Im going to have to leave college because of all this. How do I cope with everyday life with all this, any help would be greatly appreciated as I am tired of trying to fight this... Thanks!

PanicCured
10-31-2012, 04:08 AM
Please take the eating disorder seriously and focus on overcoming it under the guidance of an eating disorder expert. Start eating! Best of luck!

laurandisorder
10-31-2012, 04:25 AM
Do you mind if I ask what came first? The ED or the anxiety? Both stem from repressing negative feelings and either taken them out on yourself (the anorexia) or having them burst out in a big explosion of irrational fear (anxiety).

I was diagnosed with Anorexia at nineteen, bulimia at 21, I spent my twentieth birthday in hospital and I basically lived with some form of eating disorder for the following five years.

Honestly, I'm still messed up about food and weight now, at 30. But I'm healthy. I barely throw up and I am only about 8-10kg underweight for my height.

My advice to you is to treat the ED with full force and from every angle. Unlike the anxiety, an eating disorder can and possibly will kill you (if you have it for over five years, you have a 1/5 chance of dying from something related to it).
The quicker and more intensive the treatment, the better the outcome. Traditionally that means spending some time inpatient, not only to teach you how to eat again, but to address the issues that got you here.

I would imagine the anxiety is a by-product of the Eating Disorder - it is for me. When I stopped throwing up and/starving myself, I started having panic attacks.

You may have to put your life on hold to focus on getting better - I did, but it was worth it. I am not completely immersed in that fucked up mirror world any more. I am still troubled, I still know exactly how many calories are in everything, I still have a disconnect between my body and my brain (the anxiety), but I'm not slowly killing myself. I got through 2 degrees and I have a wonderful and rewarding job that I love now.

Good luck - and if you want to pm me at any time, you're more than welcome to xxxxx

JaneB
10-31-2012, 08:59 AM
I had a lot of trouble with an ED when I was younger. I've got it more under control now but seeing the right specialist was HUGE for me. My advice is don't settle for someone who isn't helping. I had one specialist practically reading from an ED handbook. She did some exercise where I was told to envision that I was eating a cracker, and enjoying it. Just awful. And I wasted so many sessions thinking maybe at some point she would be helfpul. Find someone you really trust and it will make a huge difference.

ILoveConorMaynard
10-31-2012, 01:29 PM
Thank you for your replies. I had more anxiety attacks today and hardly ate anything, to the extent where I felt like jelly and a muscle in my leg went funny...so I really want to sort this out asap!

I had this same problem about 6 years ago, however I recovered and it wasn't as bad. Now it's come back worse and I feel like I'm under so much pressure to eat, it's horrible!

Okay so basically, I have an intense phobia of being sick so it started by worrying about being sick, I started to get really anxious, I felt really sick through nerves to the extent where I wretch several times. After a while I associated food with being sick so now everytime I try and eat I feel sick, I wretch... Etc it's hard to explain but that's pretty much it.

I realise if I don't get better soon I might have to pull out of college but I really don't want!

Thank you for sharing your stories, you don't really notice how serious it is until someone says!

ILoveConorMaynard
10-31-2012, 01:42 PM
I guess you could say I have a phobia of food now so I suffer with anxiety everytime I try and eat :L

ILoveConorMaynard
10-31-2012, 03:20 PM
I can't stand food at the moment, the smell and the presence of food being in my mouth makes me gag. The doctor has said I have an eating disorder which could spiral into anorexia but she thinks I'm not anorexic yet...

laurandisorder
11-01-2012, 01:26 AM
Forewells is actually right. Every time my anxiety flares up, I lose a bunch of weight. I assumed it was just a spiral back to the ED, but maybe it is more to do with the anxiety?

Are you scared, like irrationally scared of food and getting fat?

Do you look in the mirror and think you look HUGE even though you know that the number on the scales says this can't possibly be true?

Hopefully a specialist will be able to sort this out for you. Just be honest about everything. If you want to get better you need to eat!

ILoveConorMaynard
11-01-2012, 01:52 AM
I never wanted to lose weight. I can see where you are coming from, maybe it is just anxiety about eating. Thank you for all your help, I just hope the specialist can help me soon! :)

PanicCured
11-01-2012, 02:51 AM
Try this:
Take fresh ginger- cut 5 slices. Boil it lightly in 2 cups of water for about 20 minutes. Pour into a cup. Let cool 5 minutes. Squeeze 1 half a lemon in it. Let cool 5 more minutes. Add 1 tablespoon honey, preferably raw organic honey. Drink the entire glass. Wait 30 minutes. Then try and eat. Let me know if this helps.

camilla91
11-01-2012, 03:02 AM
Hiya, I'm butting in here but just wanted to say the same thing that's happened to you has happened to me, the doctor has told me I have an eating disorder even though I'm 9 stone.
Its a frigging eating phobia.
That's what I have anyway, I've been referred to cbt which I must say REALLY helps so ask for a cbt therapist, to be honest I don't think doctors know very much about anxiety, mine is definately an off-shot of anxiety.
I suffer with depersonalisation and blame my food for it, I can only eat weetabix and brown bread, and drink milk and water, yet 3 different nurses and 2 different doctors told me its an eating disorder.
I want to be fat, I desperately want to put on weight,I'm happier being bigger, I'm not anorexic or bulimic but they still say it an eating disorder and want blood tests, me to see a dietician and the cbt therapist.
I wish you all the luck in the world, I know how hard this is to overcome, but with anxiety you've got to work from the bottom up, fix you food habits and the anxiety will go to.
One thing that keeps me eating is when your blood sugar is low you get anxiety like symptoms, I remember when I first started aving food problems, I didn't eat all day, it got to about 4pm and I was panickinf my head off about nothing, heart racing, mouth dry I nearly walked into the doctors to ask for help! I took a few bites out of an apple and within twenty minutes felt loads better! The panic went..
So before this gets any worse please remember foods not the enemy, start of something like custard because you know its just like a drink and you can just drink it, good luck!!

camilla91
11-01-2012, 03:56 AM
Totally agree with forwells, mines gone on for a bit now so its a bit harder to break, the cbt therapist said its too severe to even try exposure therapy yet but he's going to teach me about my thoughts and why I react like this before I start proper therapy.
Please don't end up like me, its no way to live. Imagine not being able to sit for a meal with your loved ones, its hard.
Kick it now while you've got chance.
The worst that can happen is your sick, that's not going to kill you. Starving to death is.
Look at the pregnant women with craving for coal! If they can swallow that I'm sure you can swallow some sort of food! LOL!

laurandisorder
11-01-2012, 06:17 AM
I'm guessing that the anxiety has led some of you to disordered eating - it's not typical anorexia or bulimia - although you may be diagnosed with anorexia if you meet the criteria of losing over 25% of your body weight, having a BMI of under 17.5 or missing periods for three consecutive months.

Some advice from me would be to start slow refeeding can be an issue. Get some Sustagen or Ensure from your pharmacy - you can have get a decent caloric intake from supplements. They taste a bit iffy in my opinion.

You also have to let your practioner know that the anxiety has led to this, don't be afraid to express yourself to your doctor.

ILoveConorMaynard
11-01-2012, 03:53 PM
Thank you once again for all the replies, you have given me more courage to try. :)