Xanax and drinking

[firefly06]

So I might be freaking out or it might be legit, and I'd like to know which. My boyfriend's new "thing" is drinking while on Xanax. Not a small dose, either, 2 bars or so. He knows its dangerous but doesn't listen to me when I tell him he can die in his sleep. Is there a better way to get it across, less nicely? Lol

[jhunter89]

What about : "STOP TAKING MY MEDS ASSHOLE!"

[firefly06]

Oh he got his own this time. So he thinks its better, and I shouldn't be mad since he's not taking mine...

[jhunter89]

I'd freak out too, not nice too see someone you care about behaving so recklessly.

[firefly06]

I stay because I'm afraid he'll lose his shit and kill himself (whether purposely or by drinking and mixing). Stupid, but I really don't want that guilt on me even though its his choice to do that to himself when he could instead man up and take it as a reason to improve himself and get off the bottle..

[jhunter89]

So you have to stay miserable? Do you want to leave him?

[firefly06]

Yes I do and daily I'm getting up the courage to do it. Literally the only thing stopping me is the fear that he will kill himself over it. My actions in my past have had fatal consequences and my negligence and ignorance got someone I knew killed. I didnt kill him but i still carry that guilt even though it was someone else who killed him, but if i hadnt owned that gun then it wouldnt have happened. Very different situation but I carry that fear now that my actions will lead to someone's death. I don't want to feel that trauma all over again.
But I also do not want to continue wasting my time when I know there is someone out there somewhere who is my right one and will not treat himself (and me) like this :)

[jhunter89]

Sorry to hear you have to carry that guilt around. Couldn't you inform his mum that you want to end your relationship with her son (from what I've read on one of your other posts, she would be delighted) wouldn't she keep an eye on him? I bet you've done everything you can to help him at the detriment of yourself. Like forwells said you leaving might be the wake up call he needs to sort himself out. Good luck :)

[firefly06]

Yeah I really have. I've done my best to stick it out but not only did I end up mold sick from his house (which he still believes is bullshit, I was diagnosed with neuropathy that came on when I moved into his house, and have been tested for all the other things that can cause it and the only one they didn't rule out was toxin exposure..) and even was willing to marry him even though he can't have kids and I want kids. As far as the mom goes, honestly, I have no problems cutting ties with his whole family either. I'll have to anyways because of the angry lashing out they will start on me for breaking up with their son. When I moved out of the mold house and into a safe house, they basically shunned me anyways and told him to dump me because I was "a gold digger whore just looking for a way out of the shitty trailer" He's just gonna have to man up and deal. And hopefully it will wake him up and make him see that he needs help. If not, at least I will know that I tried! And I guarantee I will sleep better at night knowing I don't have to stay awake to make sure he's breathing, and my sheets won't smell like disgusting beer sweat anymore.. (Props to any women here who have ever had to kick a beer-smelly man onto the couch before)

[jhunter89]

Just remember you are not responsible for his actions, he doesn't seem interested in making this relationship work. And you can hold your head up high and know you did all you could and you stuck around a lot longer than most people would.

[firefly06]

Well, I've also lead him to believe he can get away with it by not leaving earlier. And he always finds a way to explain away and justify his behavior, (" I worked hard today, I deserve to be able to have a few beers, why are you nagging me about drinking again??") so he doesn't feel that it's wrong or unfair. Or dangerous. Almost every alchohlic has themself convinced that its "only a couple beers" in spite of having a 12 pack every day, because they tell themself that compared to a 30 pack that so and so drinks everyday , they are not as bad as so and so persons... I'm not willing to continue to let that cycle happen in my presence and basically give him permission to continue it (by not telling him to get his shit and gtfo) because he can't do anything without being fucked up every day off one thing or another. Sure, he has a job and is sober while working, but I'm not gonna pat you on the back for that because you managed to stay sober for 8 hours. Leave it to me to find a man that doesn't cheat but everything else is wrong with him Lmfao. Anyone a sober cheater? holla! (Just kidding.)

[dazza]

In the words of Forrest Gump...

"Life is like a box of chock-clits, you nevva know wotcha gonna git"

Seems like you got the joke chocolate... the one filled with poo! pmsl


Get rid of, NOW!

[jhunter89]

Haha clits

[firefly06]

Broke up with him this morning. Feel like the biggest douchebag ever. Nothing worse than seeing a man cry. Hopefully I can sleep and feel better :/

[jhunter89]

Good for you firefly. Stick on free bird by lynyrd skynyrd lol hope you feel better soon :)

[dazza]

Broke up with him this morning. Feel like the biggest douchebag ever. Nothing worse than seeing a man cry. Hopefully I can sleep and feel better :/

Yayyyyyy!!

Onward and upwards...

[anxious123]

I don't think he's going to kill his self over it if your relationship meant that much to him he would have stopped doing the shit when u asked him to don't let yourself be miserable don't make someone a priority when your an option move on misery loves company and he wants you on his level, take care of yourself make you happy and if he does kill himself for some reason it's not your fault it's because he was a coward I hope to see you get out of this

[firefly06]

You're right and thank you :)

[anxious123]

Anytime we all need some helpful advice sometimes god knows I do :)

[firefly06]

Been away from him and feeling loads better for about a month now :) I'm far better off and the freedom has felt amazing. He's even found someone to replace me with who's a piece of work and a junkie lol.. Makes me feel even better :)