Help - Really don't know what to think or do

[Peak]

So here's the thing. I have an absolute fear of having a heart attack. I know it sounds stupid but I've always thought that one day I would have one and it scares the living daylights out of me. Why do I think I will have one? I guess it's because I have always been overweight and obese, simple as that really. About 15 years ago I started having very bad heart palpitations and went to my doctor who said I was stressed which was making my blood pressure go up and causing the palpitations. He gave me some beta blockers and the palps disappeared completely and BP came down to normal and stayed that way for the next 12 years. Then my wife and I were going through stressful times with fertility treatments and I started getting palps again. Went back to my GP who said my BP was up and thought it was all down to stress again. I got put on an Ace Inhibitor and got checked out at the hospital with ECG's, 24HR ECG, and Echo Cardiograms of the heart all of which came back normal and was told that they could find no reason for the palps and to 'just ignore them'. Since then I've been told I also have high cholesterol so basically whilst I may not be due to have a heart attack tomorrow, I'm not doing myself any favours.

Then last week I started getting lots of palps again even though I really didn't feel stressed and went back to my doctor. He didn't really check anything other than my BP which was up 150/90 but I said that I was stressed about the palps rather than the palps being caused by stress. My normal BP is 140/80. He said that since all the test at the hospital including recent blood tests at the doctors had all come back clear that the palps couldn't be anything to be worried about but gave me some beta blockers to control the palps. I've been on these for about 5 days now and the palps have almost completely stopped. However about a week ago I started getting pain down my left arm. It was actually mostly painful in the palm of the hand but also had a bit of pain in the forearm, a bit in the elbow and a bit more in the shoulder. I just thought I must have strained something as I decorating last weekend (even though I'm right handed). Over the next few days the pain has got worse in the hand but reduced in the elbow and about the same in the shoulder. Today the pain in the hand is the worst its been. It's by no means agony, far from it, just uncomfortable and it has all the hallmarks of either carple tunnel syndrome or tendonitis (which I've had in the elbow of that arm before but not in the hand). I actually now find it uncomfortable to push my fingers together against my thumb or to hold/squeeze things with the fingers of that hand. Okay so logically I know that really the pain in my arm shouldn't be related to my heart at all and just simply that I've strained something. Trouble is today I've had a couple of bouts of cold sweat but at times when either I've been travelling on the busy underground wearing a jacket or walking in the cold air again wearing a jacket. So logically I know that these 'cold sweats' aren't cod sweats but just normal sweat that has cooled. I know this logically. However I can't help now but think that I've had or am having:

1. Palpitations
2. High Blood Pressure
3. High Cholesterol
4. Pain down the left arm
5. Cold Sweats

All classic signs of the heart attack I so fear. Do I have any of the other signs of a heart attack like crushing feeling in the chest, breathlessness, weakness, dizziness etc etc. No. Apart from feeling stressed to the eyeballs I feel pretty much fine.

To be honest its the fact that squeezing the pads of my fingers together causes pain in the palm and knuckles actually makes me feel a bit more relieved as surely if this were heart related it wouldn't do this. I've also taken my BP and seen it fall in 5 minutes from 150/90 to 135/85 the former being taken when I was feeling really freaked out and the latter when I felt calmer.

I really don't know what to believe or how to keep my feelings in check.

[dazza]

Hi

I haven't got long so I'll make this brief (but will come back to it later... perhaps tomorrow)

A severe electric shock type sensation through my left/upper arm last December started me off on "heart attack" anxiety. Been suffering ever since although I'm about 85% cured now. Like you... I've had some frightening palp episodes during this time, but these are getting far less over time (perhaps once a week for a second or so now)

I'm still suffering some odd left arm / left shoulder / left hand pains and I'm starting to wonder if it's more than anxiety / fight+flight response.

I also get left palm pain and fingers. Nothing serious... just annoying and, well, darn right weird really.
The hand pain is not affecting my ability to grip, squeeze or whatever. My hand operates completely normally.

I'm not and never have been obese. A little over weight maybe.
Started to play squash again at least once a week. Only last night played 4 x intense games... sweating like a pig and heart going like a 2-stroke piston.

Tell me, do you use computers often?
I believe the left arm stuff is PROBABLY something to do with computer related posture.
Quite possibly carpel tunnel.

I'll get it seen to if it continues much more.

[dazza]

another thing before I peees orf...

Do you find your left hand is particularly sensitive to temperatures?

Mine seems sensitive or very aware of cool air in particular. STRANGE!

<que twilight zone theme tune>

[Peak]

Thanks Dazza for the reply. I'm feeling much better now and am now absolutely certain that the pain in my arm is just tendonitis or carple tunnel syndrome as now even holding a fork or bending my wrist hurts. How silly it is to be happy to be in pain for these reasons than anything else. I do use computers a lot, a hell of a lot and that could well be a factor. I had actually forgotten that I had tendonitis in this arm before a few years ago and ended up having steroid injections to 'cure' it (although the pain was in a different part of the arm then). I do get quite a few odd twinges and pains often very short but mostly on the left side of my body sometimes in the chest, sometimes in the arm. Common sense tells me these are nothing and just the normal everyday twinges that anyone and everyone gets. Unfortunately every now and then the paranoid part of my brain wins the battle and I start to build it up out of all proportion. I'm currently on the waiting list for CBT and can't wait to begin as I really think this may be the only way I can learn to keep these kind of fears, which I freely admit are stupid, at bay.

It's interesting what you say about temperature in the hand. I do find that my hands get cold not all the time but fairly frequently and only ever when I'm typing so probably proof that the circulation is being restricted at the wrists due to posture.

Thanks again for the replies, often just hearing someone else say they've experienced something similar or the empathy of others who know what it's like to be in this situation is enough to calm me down and get my feet back on the Earth.