Imagery of violence loss of control

[Greatdane]

I feel relived that i am not alone in this disturbing thoughts that come out of no where and give you a bobly sensation or indid a panic attack? Let me describe mine One evening out of the blue while with my partner I had a panic attck and all of a sudden I had the image of a knife and that I was going to lose control and hurt my partner and got scared. When to the tolilet felt like i was going insane and nearly shitted my pants. my bowel whent lose like i was losing my inside. This of course was not a plan or a desire just a horrible thought of losing control. Since then when my anxiety is high I get flash back of that memory and I get a bodly sensation. And indiid had fear of being close to any potential object that may inflict harm mostly knives. I suppose the bottom line is fear of losing control doing something out of the normal or going insane. I am in therapy and talked about this with therapist and Psychiatrist and seems to be normal to have fear of losing control or hurting loved ones. However I only saw one post on this in the net and would like some reassurance from peole who suffer with anxiety and panic attacks rather that a book text answer. Please share info on how you may have dealt it it if you experienced it if it went away or whatever you may have to offer. Sharing makes as stronger. Never thought I will exerience something this disturbing. I am on 10mg of Citalopram for 2 months an my Panic attacks have subsides but my neomories of it is still there and sometimes this thoughts that enetered my mind out of nowhere still scares me. i cant hear anything about murder of violence on telle or news papers. this things are happening everyday. And for me is the fear of what people are capable of and of course i am a person too. This is the fear of the worse scenario in my life. This what anxiety can do. Sometimes my thoughts are very unrealistic to the point that they really become very scary. After reading some posts maybe i think i am OCD my grandmother is ODC and she checks everything around the house over and over and when i was a kid she used to make me do it.

I recently met an ex sufferer of panick attacks and anxiety and she said to me when you get disturbing thoughts write them down as if it was a story make a scenario and caracters try to be as inventive as possible and turn it into something funny or a commedy. Maybe try and like do a cartoon scenario where a knife bent or the stab make someone deflate rather that hurt. I have to say i have tryed and it does work it made me laugh and took it out of my head and took the fear and seriousness of the thought out. I will practice more. I suggest someone try and tell me if it works. Now the onter thing i then encountered is this if i make fun of this then mean i will not be scared of it so i will do it. Dont fall into that trap is a guilt trip that you should take serious your thoughts and if you dont then you may do it. Think about all this horror fiction story in so many books and movies everyday on tellevision someone out there i mean some houndred thousand peopleout there are inventing this stories and thinking about them without panicking or getting concerned. We are stuck in the fear of what we are most afraid of in life. That why it takes you in all the fear that are individuals. Mine is violence as i witness that alot when i was kid.

I hope you manged to read this long post. Sorry for the long writing but i hope this may help in some ways. Lets support eachother.

Greatdane