Pffft... and it was going so well.

[camilla91]

Heya not been on for a while, thought if I gave myself a break I wouldn't think about it. Pfft. Yeah right. Well I had 3 days with no depersonalisation.. Probably because I was focused on the fact I've started seeing someone new.. Yeah that went okay.. Except he's half bloody owl. I had about 3 hours sleep a night for 3 nights in a row. I had my first panic attack in weeks yesterday. The depersonalisation caught me beautifully. Took me a while to get hold of myself. I am fucking fed up of battling with myself every single day. I hate the thoughts that come with depersonalisation. Hm with a passion. Fucking fed up. I honestly feel completely alone all the time.

[jhunter89]

Hey Cam, wondered where you been. Sorry you been having a bit of a crappy time. You still going CBT?

[TheWhiteRabbit]

Argh! Sorry to hear that.. My husband is an owl to but I know I can't be so I go to bed anyway while he stays up. I know I just can't do it. Get some rest hon and try to relax. You are not alone!!! Look how many of us go through the same thing.

[camilla91]

Thanks you two, I feel quite a bit better now, think I'm gunna stay on here now! Lol I've just gave my house a proper scrub, feel so much better, got some food in for baby, then bath time and relax lol yeah still doing CBT but because I'd not eaten when I went I spent the whole time unable to concentrate and feeling faint! Lol its so good though its absolutely amzing how our brains work, he draws out little diagrams for me and tells me how and why certain things happen.. I don't see him again for another few weeks though so I've got time to prepare food wise lol he wants me to try add a different food to my diet every week... I haven't had time to master this yet but I've got my eye on some tomato soup lol.. I'm gunna wait tll I'm calm and relaxed (maybe tonight) then I'm gunna get it lol I will eat sumat different before monday! .. I start college that day.. Scared lol

[jhunter89]

lol. It's safe here! Tomato soup mmm yummy with bread dunked in :)
Good luck at college, sounds scary and exciting!