kuhristeen
09-07-2012, 08:12 PM
Hello!
Throughout every day, I feel as if I can't really stand in the presence of people without getting extremely socially awkward and panicking. I'm kind of a people-person, but somehow, even with my closest friends, I still feel like I can't handle being in front of them without things being extremely nerve-wracking.
Not only that, I constantly[ feel as if I need to please everyone, and if not, I literally panic about not being able to accomplish anything. If I don't do anything or if I do something wrong, I feel as if I let them down or they hate me. Therefore, I try to do as many things as possible to wear myself down just to please everyone. But still, I have the sense that people aren't pleased with me, and that I can do so much better.
As much as people tell me that I'm over-doing it, I still feel worthless, and yet every time I do, I hyperventilate about it. At times, there are just nights where I have to sit on the floor because I cannot breathe because I am overthinking what I have and haven't done to please people. I guilt myself into saying "you can do more, what are you doing with your life," and with every thought, it just makes my breathing a bit worse each time.
I have a constant fear of disapproval from people, how people view me, and when people get angry toward me. Once someone is angered by me, I take it personally, and yet, I feel as if I need to fix it as much as I can to make them not be angry. It's literally a paranoia in which I think everyone hates me when they don't.
I honestly don't know what to do anymore.
Throughout every day, I feel as if I can't really stand in the presence of people without getting extremely socially awkward and panicking. I'm kind of a people-person, but somehow, even with my closest friends, I still feel like I can't handle being in front of them without things being extremely nerve-wracking.
Not only that, I constantly[ feel as if I need to please everyone, and if not, I literally panic about not being able to accomplish anything. If I don't do anything or if I do something wrong, I feel as if I let them down or they hate me. Therefore, I try to do as many things as possible to wear myself down just to please everyone. But still, I have the sense that people aren't pleased with me, and that I can do so much better.
As much as people tell me that I'm over-doing it, I still feel worthless, and yet every time I do, I hyperventilate about it. At times, there are just nights where I have to sit on the floor because I cannot breathe because I am overthinking what I have and haven't done to please people. I guilt myself into saying "you can do more, what are you doing with your life," and with every thought, it just makes my breathing a bit worse each time.
I have a constant fear of disapproval from people, how people view me, and when people get angry toward me. Once someone is angered by me, I take it personally, and yet, I feel as if I need to fix it as much as I can to make them not be angry. It's literally a paranoia in which I think everyone hates me when they don't.
I honestly don't know what to do anymore.