Derealization 24/7 for the last 15 years....

[PanicSick]

Ok, here's one of my only major symptoms that has refuse to go away in my case since my first attack started. As some of you know what it is, I'll explain for the others. I'm always feeling like I'm in a dream, like nothing's real. Sometimes the feeling is stronger, sometimes its just dormant but it's ALWAYS present. From my first attack up to today as I'm writing this post.

I'm on Paxil and Rivotril (clonazepam) right now and it doesn't do much for derealization. Actually, nothing I took helped this (Prozac, Wellbutrin, Xanax, etc, you name it, I've probably tried it) . It helps everything else except derealization.

Although I am not looking for a miracle pill (well if there's one I won't say no) but like I've said, nothing has been working on and my doctor don't want to prescribe me with antipsychotic (rightfully so) because that's not what I have. I've been check for schizophrenia, and all the related deceases that presents derealization but everything as been negative. If only I could just stop it or lower it. I could have a much better control over my anxiety and possibly solve it. Also, if there's a natural way to relieve it, be it relaxation, meditation or something of that nature, I'm also willing to try.

Thanks,

Nick

[juliana]

Hi Nick. I'm not sure if I've ever experienced what you're desribing. I get a brain fog and often feel like there's a filter between me and everything that's happening around me. When I had agoraphobia, my perception of time was really messed up. Months would feel like just a couple of days. It was surreal. I also go through periods where I sort of feel like I "wake up" in the afternoon. It's like everything I did all morning was done on auto-pilot -- like I was watching someone else doing it but I wasn't really there.

These things tend to be more common and more pronounced when I'm going through periods of high anxiety or depression. So, when my anxiety and depression got better, I found myself having those surreal experiences much less often.

How to get rid of the anxiety, though? That's the question, isn't it? What worked for me may not work for you because we're all unique. I hope you find something that works for you. Have you tried CBT?

[PanicSick]

Hi Juliana,

Thanks for your reply.

I couldn't get a clear answer to what I was experiencing. However, after reading your reply, it seems like a brain fog. It's just really hard to explain in words. I've done a lot of CBT sessions and my biggest problem was myself as I didn't follow what they told me to do... :oops: Yeah I know. But basically they told me to do relaxation with the Jacobson method. That was way back in 99. I did do it for a while but didn't went through. Oddly enough, afterwards, I went into depression and gain a whole lot of weight because I was starting to get scared of going to the gym (something I was doing 5 times a week prior to that). My whole world collapsed and I didn't know, at that time, what to do.

Today, things are better in a way. However, I just can't seem to find a place in my appartment where I can relax. I'm living with my girlfriend and we sleep in different rooms (trouble sleeping together... snoring ;) ). So I feel very unconfortable anywhere so it's tough to do any relaxation. Although I'm probably making excuses for myself here.

But what did you do? I'm interested in knowing because, even though nobody's alike, similarities can be used as treatment.

[juliana]

We all make excuses for ourselves. ;)

I made excuses all weekend about why I couldn't do yoga.

When I'm feeling particularly anxious, I'm not good at calming myself down. At times like that I'm glad I live by myself because it's easier for me to relax a bit when I'm in my OWN space and not near anyone else.

I still get the brain fog occasionally. It's something that started many years before I even had problems with anxiety. Then of course it got much, much worse when I started having panic attacks and became agoraphobic.

Now that I'm feeling much better, the brain fog is less of a problem. It rarely happens when I'm at work now. I find my head is the clearest when I'm very focused on my job or involved in something that really occupies my mind. It still tends to hit me on weekends when I'm not really busy. I wake up in a fog every Saturday morning and it usually doesn't lift until late in the evening. Getting out of my flat and doing something with friends seems to work best for me these days. When I'm not actively engaging my mind in something, I tend to get foggy. It's during my "relaxing" times that it's most prevalent.

You asked what I did. Well, I wrote a really long freaking post outlining that in the thread called HEALED. If you've got some time on your hands (seriously, it's like a dissertation), you might wants to read it. :roll: