I'm doing the best I can.

[miss_mac666]

I have been battling anxiety and depression for over 10 yrs. I find that as I got older, the worse it got. I need help and I am terrified my boyfriend is going to leave me if it doesn't get better... I have GAD, Panic Disorder, PTSD, Emetophobia, Agoraphobia, among a few other disorders. I feel life is to short to be dealing with all this. No one understands... My family treats me like a big effin joke. I do not know what to do anymore. My boyfriend doesn't know how to help me. He feels just as bad as I do, I guess... I need help. I have no one other than my boyfriend and I think he's fed up with me. So alone. Sad. Hating who I am.

[Suzzy]

I know exactly how you feel... i have Emet, agoraphobia, GAD and panic disorder, oh and chronic hyprventilation! It totally sucks. Im actually married (only since last september) and i constantly worry about how my poor husband must feel being 'stuck' with me! I worry a lot about him eventially getting fed up with me and leaving me. But he has always said he loves me no matter what and im sure your boyfriend feels the same way about you! If he didnt want to be with you, then he wouldnt be! To be dealing with so many disorders at once is soooooo hard and i often feel pretty pissed off that life has dealt me these cards. But i also know that thinking along those lines is only going to make me worse... Just got to accept what you're dealt with i guess and handle it as best as you can. In the end it'll make us much stronger people than all those 'normal' people! :) But i totally get it... i HATE what ive become and it has made me pretty depressed and very lonely - all my friends have given up on me even if my husband hasnt! Anyway, if you want to talk or whatever feel free to message me! You are NOT alone. x

[pawlowski187]

Great comment suzzy :)

[Suzzy]

Ah, thanks Pawlowski! :)

[miss_mac666]

thank you guys for the replies. suzzy i never talked to anyone who has emeto too. like i feel alone with no one to talk too. that is the main part of my anxiety and the number 1 thing that i am constantly worrying about and thinking about. i just want to stop. its gotten worse over the years and i do not know hat to do to make it just go away and leave me the hello alone... :( how do i live?

[Suzzy]

Well if you want to talk to someone who understands how much emetophobia ruins your life then here i am! Have had it my whole life.... had CBT for it when i was a teen which really helped at the time and for about a year or two i was living an almost normal life! It was amazing. But then for some reason i started to slip back into old habits/thoughts and have now ended up worse than ever. Tried CBT again last year but it didnt help at all - i think you have to click with the therapist and i had no confidence in them. Especially when I had to explain to them what emetophobia was as they'd never heard of it!!! :-/ I have pretty much NO life now because of it... i dont go anywhere, i wont travel, if i do go out i dont go far from the house, im very funny about what i'll eat, if someone is 'ill' i have been known to sit in the greenhouse crying for 2 days straight! Kinda embarrassing. :) Anyway, the list goes on and on! I dont know if you're on facebook but im part of a private group just for emetophobics and thats pretty cool.... If you'd like to join i could ask admin to let you join if you like? As its private, none of your friends will know you're a member and they wont be able to see any of your posts! Anyway, have you tried CBT? If not i would recommend it because it worked great for me the first time... its not fun and you do things you dont want to do but it really does help you in the long run. Im here if you want to chat! :)