I need an answer that will actually help.... Please....

[Silmarwen18]

I wrote a few weeks ago on the same topic, about having a strange habit that I cant kick, and Im still only getting answers that resembles "its your problem, you deal with it" or "only you can fix it"

I understand that... ive medical professionals tell me that...

The question I really want answered os HOW..... Ive had this habit since i was two... its painful, its anoying and i get constantly judged for it, even bullied most of my life... it even anoys employers...

Dont you think that if it was something I really had control of and/or was able to stop on my own I would have AGES ago?! I HATE it... it gets me riddiculed and it HURTS.... who would want that?!?!?

Can someone please actually help me....... how do I start???

[hopeNfaith88]

Hey there
First of all, thank god you arent hurting yourself or someone else. Huggin yourself is harnless, but since you want to Stop youll have to do what anyone looking to stop a habit or addiction must do: get help for it. If you cant conciously stop it (which im guessing you cant because if you could you wouldnt have let it ruin jobs) you should see a psychiatrist and therapist. It may be a minor form of OCD.

Or it may be that you need to work out the psychological trauma from your past. When you work that out and build up your self esteem, youll allow yourself to feel emotions instead of needing to hug yourself instead.

Or it could just be a habit. You started it when you were young, no one corrected it so you coninued doing it through adulthood. Similar to children who suck their thumb through adolescence because a parent never corrects it. Itll take alot of work on your part because youve been doing it for so long.

Whatever the reason behind it, be prepared to put forth effort. I know you dont want to hear that but lets face it. Its your body and your arms. You need to find the cause and work to break the habit. We cant do the work for you, only recommend routes to take. Best of luck

[Anxee]

Have you ever seen an occupational therapist? I have worked with many children that benefit from deep pressure input to their nervous system (for example, hugging and squeezing) to calm them when they get excited or nervous due to sensory issues. Sensory Processing Disorders and very common, and can range from mild to severe. Everyone has different sensory needs, but when an individual is hyposensitive (sensory seeking) or hypersensitive (over-sensitive) to certain stimuli, they need different levels of input to regulate themselves effectively. It seems very possible to me that an adult who never received treatment for sensory issues as a child could learn to compensate by providing some of their own sensory input (in your case, this may be the self-hugging when you need more input). I would really recommend trying to get an assessment or consultation with an occupational therapist, particularly one that has experience with sensory processing disorders. If you haven't seen an OT yet to rule this out, there is a chance that this is NOT just psychological/behavioral, but sensory.

I'm too new to post links, but the "Sensory Processing Disorder Foundation" has a pretty good website on sensory processing disorders. A lot of the information about sensory issues is specific to people with autism or ADD, but you can also have sensory issues without having either of these conditions. It is a complicated diagnosis and presents very differently in different individuals, so only an occupational therapist can really assess. Good luck, feel free to message me privately if you have any questions.