Been a while and first actual therapy session is tomorrow

[pamom1980]

It's been a while since I last posted in this forum.. I was going through a lot of gallbladder attacks on top of my anxiety/depression issues... I finally was able to have surgery last week to have the gallbladder removed and I have recovered nicely from that. Tomorrow is my first actual therapy session and I've got mixed feelings about it. When I saw her the first time last month, it was an assessment appointment so that she could get some background information. When I left that appointment, I felt disappointed and upset. I know she's going to dig up things that I've kept buried inside me for years. She's going to make me talk about things that I'd normally keep to myself.

I don't know.. I just don't feel comfortable with her yet. I hope that I warm up to her fairly quickly so that it will be easier to talk to her. But I'm just going to be nervous tomorrow and am already starting to feel anxious about it. I always thought that when you went for those types of appointments, you laid on a couch or something. Her office just had several different chairs.. Granted, she has a large window and it was very clean and calm.. But I just didn't feel comfortable... I wish I could just relax. After all, she's just there to help me and I wouldn't be seeing her at all if my doctor didn't think I needed to.

I'm just nervous... *sigh* Thanks for listening to me ramble... I'm heading off to bed but I just needed to vent..

[guitarist]

The first time is always hard. Even when you know this person will try to help you, you do have to talk about your issues. If the things in the past aren't an influence on your anxiety, than you don't have to talk about it, but if it does... than you should. It could only help. Television always show us a cough when somebody speaks with a therapist, but I have never seen one in real life yet. Just give the therapist a shot. If you don't feel comfortable after several sessions, than you could always find another therapist (if the therapist is the reason why you arr uncomfortable). Good luck!

[pamom1980]

I just got back from my appointment. I started out a bit nervous but I was more relaxed this time than the last time. I think I will be okay. I guess I'm nervous about her wanting to talk about sensitive subjects that would make me cry if she dug too much... But we'll see I guess. I'm supposed to start seeing her every other week now.

[Anotherday12]

Stay with it. Don't be afraid to cry. You wont be the first person to cry in front of her.

If you want to fight your fear you could try to tell her something really sensitive to you at the beginning of your appointment so you can release that stress. I have been trying to fight all my fears lately and it has been making things a lot better but it is hard.

Let us know how your next appointment goes.