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Simon
01-14-2007, 12:44 PM
Hi everyone. While this topic may seem silly to most of you, I assure you that I am dead serious about it. Any input you can give would be greatly appreciated.
One of the ways my anxiety manifests itself is by causing me to speak inappropriately. I don't mean swearing or slurring my words. I mean talking too much about things that bother me.
For example: Let's say that I have just attended a meeting where I suddenly feel that my job (as it now exists) is threatened with change and that I may have to work with someone instead of alone. Suddenly, my heart is beating fast and my mouth develops a mind of its own. I go up to someone and say something inappropriate like, "Well, I guess there goes my job!" or I go up to someone that would be involved in the change and say something stupid like, "Well, you won't be needing me anymore. I may as well starting looking for a new job now." I've even said such stupid things as, "Well, I'm a goner, I may as well just hang myself now." All the while these things are happening, I am telling myself to shut up, but I am so anxious and I've been doing this for so long that I can't stop myself before it gets blurted out. It all happens so fast, I can't catch it. Needless to say everyone thinks I'm weird and I walk away feeling absolutely humiliated. Any time I feel remotely threatened, I'm likely to act like this. It can be about anything that I feel threatened by, my local basketball team losing a game, my wife leaving me, my health, anything that in any way makes me anixious.
I have tried everything from making notes that I stick on my phone at work telling me to shut up to trying to identify triggers and catch it before it starts happening, to having a reminder pop up on my computer screen every 15 minues telling me to control myself. Nothing works! I don't have or have never developed the meains of keeping my anxiety to myself. Folks, I can be sitting at a meeting and telling myself over and over again in my mind not to speak, and it still happens. I watch myself make a fool of myself. Needless to say, no one ever wants to be around me because I am "volatile" and likely to say something stupid or controversial. It becomes so humilitating, I just want to crawl in a hole and die. I'm starting to run out of excuses for myself.
If I could conquer this - come to terms with it - find a way to control it in public, whatever - I could change my life. I know I could. I've been looking for an answer for a lot of years (a lot of years) and everytime I think I have found something, it turns out to be another dumb idea that didn't work. I have talked to a phychologist and psychiatrist about this and they tell me they have no answers other than increase the dose of medicine over and over again.
I don't know if anyone has ever had this kind of problem, but I am honestly open to any suggestions - short of shooting myself, which I feel like doing most of the time - but have never tried to do.
Anyway, thanks for letting me rant. I apologize for the length of this.
SJ

hoppipolla
01-14-2007, 02:14 PM
hey man :)

this is my first post here hooray! :D

that's an interesting problem, and it does kind of make sense. I mean, if you are feeling anxious your mind might not be entirely thinking straight and things just kinda escape! lol

the best immediate solution i think is just to be open and explain the problem to people, so they won't mind about it. That's what I try to do when I have something :)

in the long run... hmm. maybe you could try tackling the problem at it's roots and identify the signs leading up to an anxiety feeling, or find herbal or homeopathic remedies that could balance your mood out a bit. Maybe if something calms your mind it will never reach that point of anxiety that causes it to kinda... overflow and say these things! lol

good luck

Hoppi/Mike :)

jitters
01-15-2007, 03:36 AM
My wife does this if someone does somthing like accidentally bumps into her she will say "oh I guess I'm not here then" somtimes it gets embarrasing but moslty I see it as part of who she is. Altohugh I can see how such actions could make you anxious, at least you are speaking your mind and long term it is better than bottling things up like most of us do.

Duncan

P.S. Congrats on your first post hoppipolla, here have some popcorn :popcorn:

hoppipolla
01-15-2007, 06:00 AM
P.S. Congrats on your first post hoppipolla, here have some popcorn :popcorn:

thanks muchly! ^_^

Fear
01-24-2007, 02:51 AM
I don't think that increasing medicines could be good,actually I think it could be worst.I know what you mean;you always find yourself to exaggerate,right?!It happened to me too,but differently.I say stupid things,better,I act stupidly and I try to be fun when I speak,but after I just feel like an asshole.You know what I'm saying?Everytime I wonder why I started to behave that way.It happens even at home.When I was a child I used to speak a whole lot,and my family used to tell me to shut up.They even kidded me saying that when I was out between other people I just didn't say a word,for shyness (my dad and my uncle more than anyone else).Anyway,in my teenage years I just didn't speak even at home.Because that was the time when everything started.But now I just can't stop speaking again.There are things that I need to say,even stupid.I am even more critic about everything.So I try to educate myself,I just impose myself to shut up.
Try this:when you feel like speaking,try to think a lot about what you are about to say and if it's not appropriate,put a hand on your mouth like if you have toothache.Tell me if it works,ok?