leetbulldog
04-11-2012, 09:19 PM
Hey guys, we should get to know each other a little better on how our anxiety Disorder, Depression started. that way we share out thoughts and understand our disorder a little better..
Ok then I shall start then :)
my anxiety started in 2007 when I found this healthcare security guard position in my local hospital in bellflower,CA. was quite excited and eager to begin working.. never thought all those things I used to see every single night would light up my anxiety disorder. I seen people die in front of me, had to realease bodies to the mortuary people at one in the morning. Had to patrol the Emergency rooms and me seeing sick people was just getting to me.. I realize I didnt want to work there any longer because I used to take everything I seen at work home. my fellow security teammates used to tell me that if I couldn't handle this and if I thought of all the things i seen when you were in your house, the job wasn't for me. They were absolutely right, this job sure wasn't for me..I lasted just two months and I quite. Stayed at home for a while not feeling like working and not knowing that my anxiety disorder was coming.. my mind just kept seeing the sick and death everyday.every little thing that my body felt like pain and all the first thing that came to my head was the images of the sick and death at my work..me not knowing that I was triggering my own body to a world that I live today. I started with stomach pains.. I used to think the worse... That's when I was introduce to Dr. Google. I ended up in the ER like 6times before I had my first panic attack!! Dr. Google was to blame for feeding my anxiety even more. that's where the ER Docs told me there was nothing wrong with me after cat scans, MRI, blood work etc.they told me I had anxiety disorder.At first I thought they were crazy! .. I mean , I feel sick how can anxiety do all this .i lived with pain and I self diognosed muself with all the GI Problems you can find..from ulcers to colon cancer.. Lived three years with off and on pain with my stomach problems. On August of 2010, I was already feeling better and getting with my life. When my mother suffered a stroke. that there just destroyed me. Seeing your mom suffer and go through that just breaks your heart.. my mom went home a week after and now is 75percent recovered. What got to me was seeing your mom cry asking herself why that happend to her and thoughts of what if another stroke is on its way..those were all everyday thoughts for a year and a half.. well this is my story of where I believe why I have anxiety today..
Ok then I shall start then :)
my anxiety started in 2007 when I found this healthcare security guard position in my local hospital in bellflower,CA. was quite excited and eager to begin working.. never thought all those things I used to see every single night would light up my anxiety disorder. I seen people die in front of me, had to realease bodies to the mortuary people at one in the morning. Had to patrol the Emergency rooms and me seeing sick people was just getting to me.. I realize I didnt want to work there any longer because I used to take everything I seen at work home. my fellow security teammates used to tell me that if I couldn't handle this and if I thought of all the things i seen when you were in your house, the job wasn't for me. They were absolutely right, this job sure wasn't for me..I lasted just two months and I quite. Stayed at home for a while not feeling like working and not knowing that my anxiety disorder was coming.. my mind just kept seeing the sick and death everyday.every little thing that my body felt like pain and all the first thing that came to my head was the images of the sick and death at my work..me not knowing that I was triggering my own body to a world that I live today. I started with stomach pains.. I used to think the worse... That's when I was introduce to Dr. Google. I ended up in the ER like 6times before I had my first panic attack!! Dr. Google was to blame for feeding my anxiety even more. that's where the ER Docs told me there was nothing wrong with me after cat scans, MRI, blood work etc.they told me I had anxiety disorder.At first I thought they were crazy! .. I mean , I feel sick how can anxiety do all this .i lived with pain and I self diognosed muself with all the GI Problems you can find..from ulcers to colon cancer.. Lived three years with off and on pain with my stomach problems. On August of 2010, I was already feeling better and getting with my life. When my mother suffered a stroke. that there just destroyed me. Seeing your mom suffer and go through that just breaks your heart.. my mom went home a week after and now is 75percent recovered. What got to me was seeing your mom cry asking herself why that happend to her and thoughts of what if another stroke is on its way..those were all everyday thoughts for a year and a half.. well this is my story of where I believe why I have anxiety today..